


Together (We Can Dream)

by wasatch_97



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: M/M, Na Jaemin-centric, Slow Burn, all the dreamies have a mental illness, but so sweet, chensung - Freeform, dreamies in a therapy school, finding true family, im bad at tagging sorry, jaemin suffers from depression, jaemin wants to help jeno, jisung is quiet, mark loves donghyuck So Much, markhyuck, markno are best friends, mental health, nomin, renhyuckmin are best friends, renjun is amazing, taco nights, they're all getting better together, this is a mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2019-10-23 08:37:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 25,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17680109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wasatch_97/pseuds/wasatch_97
Summary: Na Jaemin wants to get better.Or:Jaemin meets six boys at a therapeutic boarding school and doesn't find what he expected, maybe just a little bit more.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, welcome to my first Dream chapter fic! I am really excited to write this because I try to promote understanding of mental health, especially through writing. All the boys will be dealing with a different mental health issue in this fic, so if you think any of it will trigger you please stop reading. I hope you all enjoy!

“I’m nervous.” 

“I know,” Eunae, Jaemin's mother replied, patting the boy's shoulder. “But you can get treatment here that I can’t offer you otherwise back home.” 

“It’s my first time at a boarding school,” Jaemin murmured, squinting at the brick building in front of him, “and it’s not even a normal school.” It definitely didn’t look like one; it was surrounded by gardens and greenhouses, and the building looked more like an old New England style university campus than a therapy boarding school for teenagers. 

Eunae smiled sweetly at him. “You’ll have all your normal academic classes and then some therapeutic classes to help you get through and understand your depression, but you’ll be around boys your age who understand what you’re going through. Please give it a chance? I’ll be back to visit you as much as I can.” 

Jaemin ran a hand through his caramel colored hair and sighed. His mother was away for work more often than not, and they both knew she wouldn’t have much time to visit, especially all the way out to Busan, a trip she couldn’t afford to take a lot from their home in Seoul. But he still loved her, no matter what, even if she couldn't be present. Having her raise him by herself for many years had tightened their parent-child bond. “I’ll do it for you.” 

His mother smiled, pulling him into a tight hug. He was taller now, standing about half a head over her, but her hugs still were warm and welcoming, like they always had been. “For you, Jaemin. Do this for you. If your father were here he would be so proud.” 

“I miss him,” Jaemin murmured, arms loosening around Eunae as she stepped back. “I wish he was alive and with us right now.” 

Eunae kissed his cheek before taking Jaemin's arm and leading them into the building, Jaemin carrying his large duffel bag filled with his necessities in his free hand. “Come on, let’s get you checked in.” 

***

Jaemin had kissed his mother goodbye, taking his new schedule and room key from the woman at the front desk. Her face pinched up like she had eaten a lemon, but her words of welcome seemed kind and genuine, and Jaemin felt some of his nervousness seep away. Jaemin had asked who he was rooming with and she hadn’t replied with many details, just that there were six other boys, apparently the most welcoming group of kids on campus. 

So Jaemin wound his way through the school, passing small groups of boys and girls in the classroom hallways, before finding himself in the cafeteria. He walked for what seemed like hours, lost in the building, until he exited the main part of the school, some girl having told him that the boys dorms were connected to the far right corner of the main building. He then he found himself in front of the door marked 309, his new room, biting his lip. It was all so new to him, and he felt like he was about to collapse from the stress. But like his mother said, maybe this place would help him. 

Jaemin hoped for the best and pushed his key into the lock, the door swinging open. Stepping inside, he immediately noticed that he was in a living area with a couch and television, a dining room table, and a kitchen on the far side of the room. There were four doors situated opposite the front door, which he assumed to be the bedrooms. All in all, it wasn’t a bad looking place; the furniture looked used, but still rather new, and the large windows let in plenty of light. Maybe this wouldn’t be such a bad thing after all. 

Jaemin bit his lip, unsure of what to do, not wanting to barge into the other boys' space unannounced. But much to his luck, one of the bedroom doors flew open, causing Jaemin to drop his duffle bag in shock. A boy with orange hair barged out, towing a shorter boy with dark hair by the arm into the living area, smiling widely at Jaemin. “You must be the new roomie!” 

“O-Oh, yeah, I’m Jaemin,” he greeted, blushing from the attention. 

“He’s so cute!” the orange haired boy squealed, clasping his hands together and looking like a female lead straight out of a drama. 

“Donghyuck, chill,” the dark haired boy said, crossing his arms over his narrow chest. Looking closely at their faces, Jaemin noticed dark circles underneath their eyes, especially the dark haired boy’s. 

“Sorry,” the boy, Donghyuck, said, “Renjunie here doesn’t appreciate enthusiasm.” 

‘Renjunie’ rolled his eyes and shook his head. “I’m Renjun, seventeen years old, the second oldest in our dorm. It’s nice to meet you, Jaemin.” 

“It’s nice to meet you too,” Jaemin murmured, nervous. 

“I’m Donghyuck,” said boy introduced, “also seventeen and the supposed happy virus of our group.” 

Jaemin smiled, already liking the two boys. He pulled on the sleeves of his hoodie, tugging at a loose string. “This dorm looks nice, I was sort of expecting a hole in the ground, to be honest.” He winced at his abrupt change of topic, social awkwardness getting the best of him. 

“It’s actually a really nice facility, probably the best in the country,” Renjun said, guiding Jaemin further into the room, Donghyuck picking up his duffel for him. They seemed not to have noticed his change of subject. “But yes, most mental health hospitals and schools are shitholes.” 

“Junnie, let’s show Jaeminie to his room before you start spurting out statistics and facts,” Donghyuck whined, before turning to Jaemin. The latter felt joy bubble up inside his chest at Donghyuck’s use of a nickname for him, having not had one besides 'Sweetheart,' which was only used by his mother. “Renjun is our resident nerd, along with Mark hyung. You’ll meet him and the rest of the gang later.” 

“You guys all seem like you’re very close,” Jaemin said, watching as Renjun swatted at Donghyuck in retaliation. 

“We are,” Donghyuck said, a bright smile on his face. “We’re a family.” 

Donghyuck and Renjun led Jaemin one of the rooms, and looking around, Jaemin observed that there were two beds, one of which looked used, that part of the room decorated with band posters and what looked like printed pictures and polaroids tacked to the wall. Donghyuck placed Jaemin’s duffel on the free bed. “This is it! We have ensuite bathrooms in each bedroom which is really nice,” he said, pointing to another door next to one of the two closets. 

“Who am I sharing with?” Jaemin asked, pointing to the other bed. 

“Jeno,” Renjun hummed. “You’ll like him, he’s sweet, but he might take a while to warm up to you.” 

“Jen is like any skittish animal,” Donghyuck snickered. “You have to let him come to you.” 

“Yah, stop comparing him to things,” Renjun shouted, whacking Donghyuck’s arm. 

Jaemin giggled. “I’m looking forward to meeting him.” 

“Anyways, we’ll leave you to settle in, but if you need us, my room is the one furthest to the left. I don’t share it with anyone so it’s small, but you can come there if you need a place to chill, or just hide from the other boys,” Renjun said, Donghyuck rolling his eyes. “Donghyuck and Mark’s room is the one to the left of this one, and Chenle and Jisung’s is the one in between mine and Hyuck’s.” 

“Okay, thank you,” Jaemin responded, smiling. “I’ll see you later then?” 

“Yep!” Donghyuck cheered, leaning forward to grab Jaemin into a hug. 

“Let’s let him be,” Renjun grumbled, pulling Donghyuck from the room. “Bye, Jaemin.” 

“Bye, Renjun, Donghyuck.” The both waved goodbyes at him, but before the door fully closed Jaemin heard a shout. 

“Oh, Jaems, we’re having family taco night at six! Come out and join us, you won’t miss the noise.” 

Jaemin smiled, reaching down to unzip his duffle bag. Maybe he would like it there after all.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Meet the rest of the boys!

Jaemin sighed, tucking the last of his clothes away in the previously empty closet. Checking his phone, he noted that the time was nearing six. He wouldn’t admit it, but he had shoved down his nerves and was actually looking forward to ‘Family Taco Night.’ If the other four boys were anything like Donghyuck and Renjun, he was excited to meet them. Having gone too long without friends or social interaction in general was taking a toll on him. 

He was about to glance at his phone again when he heard a door slam open in the other room, most likely the front door, a bunch of loud voices filtering in. Jaemin internally prepared himself, walking to his door. He was going to make friends, and nothing would change that. 

Upon entering the living area, five pairs of eyes met his, the laughter and shouting dying down. Jaemin wrapped his arms around himself shyly, playing with the red fabric of his hoodie. “Hi.” 

“Jaeminie!” Donghyuck crowed, running forward to sling a comforting arm around the boy. “This is the gang.” 

Jaemin looked up, glancing at the boys one by one. He recognized Renjun, but was met with three new faces. One boy had black hair and strong cheekbones, another had a cute eye smile and blonde hair, and the last boy was tall and thin with a skinny face and a high nose, also sporting a head of blonde hair. They were all beautiful, and Jaemin briefly wondered what was in Busan water to make them so handsome. 

“I’m Mark,” the boy with black hair introduced, giving Jaemin a welcoming smile. “I’m eighteen years old, the oldest here. It’s nice to meet you.” 

“I’m Chenle, sixteen!” eye-smile boy said, grinning. “And this is Jisung, also sixteen,” he added, pointing to the tall boy who shied away from the attention. “Welcome to the Dreamies.” 

Jaemin cocked his head and Mark noticed his confusion. “We decided to call ourselves the Dreamies a long time ago, something cheesy about always reaching our dreams, no matter how much we have to go through to get there.” 

“It’s not cheesy,” Donghyuck sighed, letting Jaemin go in order to bound over to Mark, hooking his chin over the boy's shoulder with his arms wound around his neck. “You’re just not optimistic enough.” 

Mark rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to argue, but Chenle cut him off, looking back at Jaemin. “Have you ever made tacos before, Jaeminie?” 

Jaemin shook his head. “Are we going to?” 

“Hell no,” Renjun snorted, “none of us can be trusted in the kitchen. Every Thursday we get our favorite counselor, MC Ari, to sneak in Taco Bell.” He held up two large paper bags, the logo of the fast food joint wrinkled under Renjun's grip. 

“Welcome to taco night, Dreamie style,” Donghyuck laughed, taking the bags from Renjun and putting them on the table. “Let’s eat!” 

The boys didn’t need to be told twice, Chenle grabbing a taco and hoisting himself up onto the kitchen counter and proceeded to shout at the older boys, but not before accidentally shoving a pile of chopsticks off the space next to him with his foot, Jaemin jumping away from the projectiles. Jisung took a taco and scurried to sit at the far end of the table, while Renjun and Donghyuck fought over a bag of chips, faces growing red from bickering. 

“It’s a lot, I know,” Mark said, coming up from behind Jaemin, making the younger boy jump. “Sorry for startling you,” he grinned sheepishly. 

“It’s okay,” Jaemin responded, smiling. 

“You’ll like it here eventually,” Mark continued, “all the staff members are wonderful and we,” he pointed to himself and then to the other boys, “will always be around if you’re feeling alone. Or just want to hang out with probably the most idiotic people in the country.” 

Jaemin laughed. “Thank you, Mark. That means a lot.” 

“Take this,” Mark said, handing Jaemin a taco. “I took some before they all disappeared. One tip, always get to the food first, or you won’t have anything to eat.” 

Jaemin grinned, unwrapping the taco and taking a bite. “Thanks again.” 

“Anytime. I’ve got to look out for my younger brothers, right?” Mark laughed, ruffling Jaemin’s hair. "And call me hyung, Jaeminie. Whether you like it or not, you're one of us now." 

Jaemin let out a smile to rival the sun, fingers tightening around his taco. Maybe it was his imagination, but he felt as if he was starting to belong. 

***

“So I thought there were six of you?” Jaemin asked, helping Renjun clean up all the taco wrappings, throwing them into the garbage can. 

“There are,” Mark responded, drumming out a beat on the table top. 

“Jeno hyung’s therapy session ran really late today,” Chenle said, frowning. Renjun sat down next to the younger, while Jaemin found a chair between Donghyuck and Renjun. “But we saved him a taco for when he gets back, so that should lighten his mood.” 

“Oh! We never told you why we’re all even here,” Donghyuck said, putting his feet on Mark’s lap, the latter huffing in mock annoyance. “Are we all good with sharing?” He asked, looking at the other boys who nodded. 

“In that case, I’ll start,” Mark said, rubbing Donghyuck’s calf. “I’m in here to receive treatment for my eating disorder.” 

Jaemin nodded, sending him a smile. “I hope it’s going well for you, hyung.” 

Mark grinned. “Yeah, it is.” 

Donghyuck smiled, wrapping his arms around Mark's neck. “I’m happy for you, eating dinner tonight,” Donghyuck whispered in Mark’s ear, so quietly Jaemin would have missed it if he hadn’t been paying close attention. He did miss Mark’s hand drawing a heart on Donghyuck’s thigh. 

“I’m here because I have bipolar disorder, which is basically where I can have too much energy or too little,” Donghyuck continued, taking Mark’s hand to play with his fingers. Something about their skinship screamed ‘not platonic’ at Jaemin, but he didn’t want to make assumptions. “There's a long drawn out explanation to it, just like any other mental health issue, but I'm pretty easy to read. Depressed or hyper." Mark rubbed Donghyuck's side, bringing back the younger boy's smile that had faded away. "Right now I’m teetering on the line between hypomania and mania, so I haven’t been sleeping. Does wonders for my complexion,” he said sarcastically, pointing to the circles under his eyes. Jaemin nodded, that explained what Jaemin had noticed when they met. 

“Hyuck and I are in the same boat, as far as not sleeping. When he’s not manic he has relatively normal sleeping patterns, but I on the other hand don’t sleep at all,” Renjun said. “Insomnia. Not fun, let me tell you. That’s why I have my own room, it’s because I tend to do all my studying during the night.” 

“He’s our resident night owl,” Chenle said, throwing a used napkin at the pile of taco-trash. “I have self-esteem issues. Usually when I have to go to class and talk to a large amount of kids. Otherwise I’m usually fine.” 

Jaemin nodded. “Are you uncomfortable with me being here?” 

Chenle shook his head, grinning. “It’s just crowds mainly. Don’t worry, I like you already, Jaeminie hyung.” 

Jaemin cracked a smile at Chenle before the room quieted down. 

“I have PTSD.” 

Jaemin spun around at the noise, looking at Jisung. “Thanks for sharing, Jisung,” Jaemin said softly, knowing it wasn’t his place to ask questions, especially with Jisung looking like a frightened mouse. “I have depression,” he stated firmly, letting himself divulge that information. To anyone outside of this room he wouldn’t have said it, but now he knew the boys were all like him; struggling with stigma. “And it sucks.” 

“Amen to that!” Donghyuck laughed, vaulting off of his chair to hug Jaemin. “We’re happy to have you here, Jaems.” 

“Thanks,” Jaemin laughed, hugging the boy back. “Is it too early to say I think I’ve finally found a place where I belong?” 

“No,” Chenle said, “when it’s real, you will always know.” 

“I vote we watch _Mulan_ ,” Mark said, standing up and walking behind Chenle who was dragging Jisung with him to one of the armchairs next to the couch. The other three boys followed suit, Donghyuck still hanging happily off of Jaemin, all ending up in front of the television snuggled together. 

Half way through the movie, Mark was asleep on Donghyuck’s shoulder and Renjun was playing sudoku on his phone. Jaemin's eyes barely open as he watched the blurred outlines of cartoons play across the screen when the door swung open. 

“I’m home.” 

Jaemin turned around to see who had come in and swore he saw an angel.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Markhyuck and Chensung nations rise! Renjun the Organ Donor™ & Jeno and Jaemin interact(?)

“Did I do something wrong?” 

Chenle shook his head. “No, Jeno just tends to yeet out of the place randomly.” 

“Who even says ‘yeet’ anymore?” Donghyuck asked, scrunching his nose. “Gross.” 

“Can’t help the fact that Jeno just yeeted himself right into Injun’s room,” Chenle said, shrugging. 

Mark rolled his eyes, facing Jaemin, the iconic soundtrack of _Mulan_ playing in the background. “Jeno has severe anxiety,” he explained. “He has a hard time getting to know people, but once he opens up he can be one of the best parts of your life.” 

“What about me?” Donghyuck whined, clinging to Mark’s arm. “Am I being replaced by Jen?” 

Mark laughed, kissing Donghyuck’s forehead. _Definitely not platonic_. “Jeno’s my best friend, you’re not getting replaced.” 

“So you’re,” Jaemin gestured between the two of them. 

“Yep,” Donghyuck smiled, “going on four years now. We’ve known each other since we were very young.” 

“Cute,” Jaemin grinned, “you look good together.” 

“Don’t encourage them,” Renjun said as Donghyuck preened, “they’re absolutely disgusting. The only cute couple is the maknaes.” 

“Oh?” Jaemin asked, turning to where Chenle was petting Jisung’s hair. Come to think of it, from what Jaemin had seen, Jisung had only let Chenle touch him. 

“We’ve been together for six months,” Chenle smiled, kissing Jisung’s ear, causing the boy to turn pink and swat at his boyfriend. “We met here.” 

Jaemin cooed at the sight. “What about you, Renjun? Got anyone in mind?” 

Renjun shook his head. “I have given up on men. I’ve now devoted my life to science, and if I die, I will take my rightful place as an organ donor.” 

“That’s a long and drawn out way to say you’re going to become a hermit,” Donghyuck said, rolling his eyes. 

“What about you, Jaemin hyung?” Chenle asked, pushing back Jisung’s bangs and letting the hair fall through his fingers. 

“Haven’t had a boyfriend in a long time,” he laughed. “It’s okay though, not many people can handle all this,” he said, gesturing to himself. 

“Oh my god, I feel you. I never thought Mark would make a move,” Donghyuck exclaimed as they laughed, hooking his chin onto his boyfriend’s shoulder. 

“Hey!” said boy shouted indignantly. 

“So, about Jeno,” Jaemin started, looking towards Renjun’s room where the boy had escaped to. “What do I do about tonight? Since we’re sharing rooms?” 

“Just act normal,” Mark advised, “he’ll come through.” 

***

Jaemin sat in his bed, putzing around on his computer. He was tired and wanted to sleep, but wanted to see and interact with his new roommate more. Finally, towards midnight, the door finally swung open and Jaemin looked up to see Jeno in the doorway, looking much the same as he did the first time Jaemin saw him; black hair and large eyes, wearing a grey hoodie and tight black jeans. 

“Y-You’re awake?” 

“Yeah,” Jaemin breathed, watching as his (extremely attractive) roommate backed towards his side of the room, never looking away from Jaemin as if the latter would pounce on him. 

“I-I’m J-Jeno,” he stuttered, fumbling with a drawer in his bureau. 

“I’m Jaemin.” 

“I know.” 

Both he and Jaemin turned bright red. “I hope I’m not frightening you,” Jaemin whispered. 

“Y-You are,” Jeno responded, voice equally soft, and Jaemin flinched. “B-But I k-know you don’t mean to.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Me too.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *Meg Ryan voice* "Lactose intolerance!!!"

"Jaems, he told you it wasn’t your fault. And you’re a massive teddy bear, you couldn’t hurt or scare anyone if you tried. Don’t beat yourself up over it.” That was what Donghyuck had told Jaemin a week ago after The Lee Jeno Incident™. 

Jaemin had started school, his classes average for the most part, and he enjoyed having one on one therapy more so than group meetings. Homework had been building up, and already in the first week he had stayed up late into the night with Renjun and Donghyuck working on school assignments. 

He had also learned that the academic classes varied in size, some were more of an average size, whereas quite a few classes were small, just a few people, adapted for the needs of the students taking the course. Chenle, Jisung, and Jeno seemed to be in those specialized classes, the older two for their anxieties and Jisung for whatever it was that had caused his mental illness. Jaemin hadn’t asked about his PTSD, respecting the boy’s privacy. 

Jeno seemed unchanging, he either stayed out of the dorm until late, coming home when Jaemin was getting ready for bed, or sitting in a far corner of the dorm, starting the occasional conversation with one of the boys, most frequently Mark. Jaemin felt disappointed in himself that he was making the other boy uncomfortable, but he didn’t know what else to do than just wait. 

Jaemin stared at the cheerios floating on top of the milk in his bowl, his quickly made breakfast only half finished. His classes didn’t start for a couple of hours, so he was spending the time in the kitchen with the other boys, listening to a random pop song playlist. Donghyuck and Chenle were dancing around the kitchen island, hooting and hollering at each other while Renjun and Jisung were talking in hushed tones. Mark and Jeno were on the couch eating pop tarts and playing Halo. Just a week after moving in, Jaemin had figured out that this was the normal routine for the boys. 

Jaemin watched a cheerio sink to the bottom of his bowl, his stomach twisting, about to reject all the dairy he had eaten that morning. 

“I’m going to be sick.” 

“What do you mean!” Donghyuck cried, running after Jaemin as he made a break for his bathroom. 

Jaemin collapsed on the cool tiles, gripping the toilet firmly as he emptied out his stomach. Donghyuck dropped to his knees beside him, rubbing his back as he vomited. 

“Shit, I feel disgusting,” Jaemin groaned when he finished, leaning into Donghyuck’s open arms, only to sit up quickly once again, hurling into the toilet bowl. A wonderful start to the day. 

***

“So let me get this straight,” Renjun said, standing in front of Jaemin who was lying on the couch with his head on Donghyuck’s lap. The other boys were milling around, all looking very concerned. “You’re lactose intolerant, but you accepted a milkshake, string cheese, and a bowl of cereal from us all in the span of two hours? Are you insane?” 

“I didn’t mean-” 

“Don’t scare us like that,” a quiet voice called from somewhere near the kitchen. Jeno. He looked shocked at himself for speaking. 

“I’m sorry, I just really like milk,” Jaemin whined, ignoring the fluttery feeling he got in his chest when Jeno spoke, passing it off as after effects of throwing up, even though it obviously wasn’t. He couldn’t be catching feelings for a boy who was literally scared of him. Or scared of the idea of him. 

“You’re an idiot,” Donghyuck cooed, patting down his forehead with a towel. “A cute idiot. If you do some aegyo Junnie will definitely forgive you.” 

Renjun frowned. “I’m not mad, I’m upset that we almost killed our new roommate just a week after he moved in.” 

“I’m glad I don’t have classes until later this morning,” Jaemin groaned, shifting into a slightly more comfortable position, “it feels like a cement truck ran over me.” 

Renjun sighed. “Well, Mark, Chensung, and I have classes right now, so we’ll see you at lunch, yeah?” 

Jaemin nodded in confirmation. “So Chenle and Jisung are a single entity?” 

“Yeah, that sounds about right,” Donghyuck snickered, pulling Mark down by his uniform tie to kiss him. Right over Jaemin’s face, where he was still resting his head on Donghyuck’s thighs. 

“Really?” 

“Sorry,” Donghyuck said, not looking sorry at all. Mark at least looked a little bit guilty. “See you all later.” 

Donghyuck coddled Jaemin for several minutes after the boys left before leaving him alone on the couch, saying something about taking a shower. Jaemin rolled around a bit, trying to get comfortable, when he noticed a shadow looming over him. 

“How are you feeling?” 

Jaemin looked up, eyes widening as he observed Jeno. “I-I’m feeling a bit better, just tired,” he stuttered out, blushing. 

Jeno knelt down, taking the towel from where Donghyuck had tossed it to the side, tentatively reaching out and wiping away the perspiration on Jaemin’s forehead from the exertion of throwing up. “I-Is this okay?” he whispered, noting the younger boy’s frozen state. 

“Y-Yes,” Jaemin breathed, not moving, afraid of scaring the boy away. 

It was silent after that, Jeno gingerly brushing aside Jaemin’s bangs, his fingers burning the younger’s skin. 

“I-I’m trying,” Jeno said, retracting his hand and staring at Jaemin. "I w-want to know you, so I'm t-trying." 

“I know.” 

“I should go.” 

“Okay.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **flower child of the american 1960s:** they MEMED me

_(huang42)_ created a chat  
_(huang42)_ named the chat **Donghyuck don’t mooch off of Renjun’s Netflix account**  
_(huang42)_ added _(d.hyuck721)_ , _(leejenuwu)_ , _(najaemin00)_  
_(huang42)_ named _(d.hyuck721)_ **satans right hand**  
_(huang42)_ named _(leejenuwu)_ **flower child of the american 1960s**  
_(huang42)_ named _(najaemin00)_ **drink them soybeans**  
_(huang42)_ named _(huang42)_ **local pawnbroker**  


**satans right hand:** honestly no objections 2the names on my part 

**drink them soybeans:** creative. 

**drink them soybeans:** but can i ask abt ur user jun? 

**local pawnbroker:** i take stuff off of peoples hands, burn it, and keep the money 

**local pawnbroker:** its a win-win for all, people dont have anymore junk and i have $$ 

**satans right hand:** he spends it all on green lantern figurines 

**drink them soybeans:** lol 

**local pawnbroker:** ANYWAYS 

**local pawnbroker:** I’m calling 2 attention that we’re having a 00 line mtg tnight 

**satans right hand:** fuck yaas 

**drink them soybeans:** huh? 

**satans right hand:** dammit jaems now i cant get the meme outta my head 

**drink them soybeans:** wat 

**local pawnbroker:** the meme of jen sounding like the dog goin “huh” omg 

**drink them soybeans:** im lost 

**flower child of the american 1960s:** they MEMED me 

**satans right hand:** jen was all confused over his calc hw an made a cute noise 

**satans right hand:** luckly i had just found a clip of a dog making the same noise 

**local pawnbroker:** so now jenos memed w a dog 

**drink them soybeans:** can i just 

**drink them soybeans:** furry 

**satans right hand:** dsJSLKFKJDS 

**local pawnbroker:**!!!Jaemin!!! 

**flower child of the american 1960s:** I hate you All. 

**drink them soybeans:** sorry jeno :( 

**local pawnbroker:** donghyuck is enjoying this too much 

**local pawnbroker:** he just knocked over his desk chair while laughing 

**local pawnbroker:** i could hear it all the way in the kitchen 

**drink them soybeans:** :( 

**flower child of the american 1960s:** dont pout 

**satans right hand:** *whispers* whipped 

**flower child of the american 1960s:** you noodle i will deck u 

**satans right hand:** come at me bish 

**local pawnbroker:** PLEASe stop 

**local pawnbroker:** come 2 my room at seven,, we gonna have ‘00 movie night ;) 

**drink them soybeans:** im lowkey terrified but excited 

**satans right hand:** u should be 

**drink them soybeans:** thAT DOESNT HELP


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "It looks like seventies porno."  
> "And that's out!"

“So what are we going to do?” Jaemin asked, sitting down with his back against the bed next Renjun who was fiddling with a stress ball. 

“We had a pizza snuck in-” 

“How.” 

“We have connections,” Donghyuck continued, spinning around in Renjun’s desk chair, making Jaemin dizzy. “So basically pizza, a movie or two, and gossip. It’s Friday so we don’t have classes besides therapy tomorrow, so we can stay up.” 

Jaemin nodded, playing with the sleeve of his Totoro onesie. “Where’s Jeno?” 

“He should be here any minute,” Renjun said, checking his phone for messages. “So anyways, how was your day, Jaems?” 

“Uneventful,” Jaemin sighed, picking at a string in the carpet. “Literally nothing interesting happened, aside from Mr. Park, my history teacher, getting stung by a bee in the middle of a lecture.” Renjun snickered. 

“Well we’re about to change that,” Donghyuck smirked, “‘00 liner nights are always iconic. Oh, hey Jen.” 

Jaemin looked to the door where Jeno was standing, awkwardly shifting from one foot to the other, face partially hidden by shadows. “Hey, Jeno,” the youngest parroted. Donghyuck snorted. 

Jeno sat down on the bed as Renjun crawled across the floor to grab his computer and dvds. “So I was hunting around in my closet and found a couple of movies,” Renjun explained as Donghyuck opened the pizza box, taking out a slice and trying to eat it without a plate, cheese instantly falling onto the carpet. Renjun glared at him and Jaemin shivered. Icy. 

“As I was saying, I found some movies. First, _Moana,_ ” he continued, holding up said dvd, “and then a massage instruction guide movie thing that apparently you follow along to?” He looked closely at the case. “Apparently it teaches you how to give ‘excellent back rubs.’” 

Donghyuck snorted, leaning over Renjun to look at the cover. “It looks like a seventies porno.” 

“And that’s out!” Jaemin yelled, ripping the box from Renjun’s hands and throwing it towards the closet. “No way in hell am I watching something that resembles porn with you all. Or at all. Gross.” 

“I guess _Moana_ it is,” the eldest said, opening his computer and loading the disk into the device. 

Sixty minutes later found Donghyuck singing along to the soundtrack, his rendition of _How Far I'll Go_ actually strangely good, Renjun crying over Grandma Tala’s death, and Jeno asleep with his head near Jaemin’s hip, having moved to the floor to be in reach of the pizza an hour ago. 

“You’re staring.” 

“What?” Jaemin jumped, eyes widening. 

Donghyuck grinned at him. “You’re making heart eyes at Jeno.” 

Jaemin blushed. “No.” 

“Yes.” 

“No.” 

“Shut _up_ , I’m watching the fucking movie!” Renjun whisper shrieked, throwing his stress ball and Donghyuck and yeeting away his tears, Donghyuck stifling a laugh. 

Jaemin’s gaze dropped back down to the boy by his side who was nudging closer, his hair brushing Jaemin’s waist. Jeno let out a tiny sigh, eyelashes resting prettily on his cheeks and lips parted ever so slightly. Jaemin did his best not to freeze, instead reaching down to tentatively move Jeno’s fringe to the side. When he looked up he caught Donghyuck’s gaze, the older boy smirking knowingly. “Shut up.” 

***

“Jaemin. Jaems. Wake up.” 

“Hmm?” Jaemin mumbled, shifting slightly in his sleep. 

“Jaems, it’s one in the afternoon. You have therapy soon.” 

Jaemin cracked an eye open to be met with Donghyuck’s face. “Go away.” 

Donghyuck groaned, quickly grabbing all the blankets that had ended up on the floor with the boys the previous night and ripped them away from Jaemin. “Get up.” 

“You’re ruthless,” Jaemin cried, picking himself up off of the floor and grimacing at the pain in his back from sleeping on the ground. 

“C’mon, let’s go get some breakfast, or I guess lunch now.” Donghyuck led him into the common area, blowing a kiss at Mark who was on the couch, and going straight for the pantry. “Catch!” he yelled, throwing a package of twinkies at Jaemin. 

Jaemin knew he wasn’t going to catch the food, he always got low grades in physical education for his inability to calculate distance. So he was prepared for the pastries to splat on the ground when they missed him by a foot, but a hand shot out and grabbed them. 

“Here.” 

Jaemin looked up and gulped. 

Jeno. 

Wearing glasses. 

Suddenly his brain could not compute. “G-Glasses, y-you have glasses,” he said in awe, staring at the older boy wide-eyed. Donghyuck burst out laughing, loud and obnoxiously dramatic, but it was all background noise to Jaemin. 

“Yeah,” Jeno relpied shyly, pushing the glasses further up his nose. “Chenle stole my contacts ‘cause I ate his cheerios this morning.” 

“Good.” 

“What?” 

Donghyuck collapsed to the floor, chest heaving as tears sprung to his eyes, sounding like a dying hyena. 

“I mean, like, you look really good in glasses?” Jaemin backtracked, blushing fiercely. 

“Thanks, I guess?” Jeno was the color of a plum. 

“I should, uhm,” Jaemin pointed behind him towards the door, “therapy.” 

“Yeah, you shouldn’t miss that,” Jeno answered, scratching the back of his neck. 

“I’ll see you later, then?” 

Jeno nodded. “Sure.” 

“Do you think Jaemin realized he’s still wearing his onesie from last night?” Donghyuck asked Mark after Jaemin hightailed it out of the dorm and Jeno receded into his room. 

“Honestly, I think his mind was preoccupied elsewhere.”


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jisung gives relationship advice, the boys dye their hair, & Jeno is a panicked gay (like normal?)

Jaemin looked around the cafeteria, searching for any familiar face. He smiled when he spotted Jisung’s blonde head leaving the hall, and before the boy completely disappeared, he trailed after him, following the youngest into an empty classroom. “Jisung?” 

The boy jumped in shock, not having realized Jaemin was there, the apple on his lunch tray falling to the ground. “Hyung,” he breathed, staring at Jaemin with wide eyes. 

“I’m so sorry, Sungie,” Jaemin apologized, picking up the apple and handing it back to Jisung. “I didn’t mean to scare you, I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay,” Jisung murmured, setting his tray on a desk, Jaemin following suit, “I know you didn’t mean it.” 

Jaemin nodded. “How are you today?” 

Jisung shrugged. “Okay. Better than you were doing the other morning,” he jabbed, snickering a little. Jaemin then decided it was his goal to make Jisung laugh as much as he could. 

“I love milk, it’s not fair that I have this curse.” 

Jisung rolled his eyes. “Just don’t get sick again, hyung, Jeno hyung was worked up the whole day.” Both his and Jaemin’s eyes widened. “I didn’t mean to say that,” he rushed out. 

“It’s okay,” Jaemin said, smiling. “Jeno was worried?” 

Jisung nodded. “Hyung cares for you a lot.” 

“He’s only known me for under a month and has hardly carried on a conversation with me,” Jaemin whispered. 

“Do feelings for someone, romantic or platonic, have to develop over a long period of time?” Jisung asked, unwrapping his sandwich and taking a bite. 

“I suppose not,” Jaemin hummed. 

“When I first came here and Chenle hyung introduced himself, I had a gut feeling he was the one I could spill all my worries to, even if it took me a while to open up. And look where we are now.” 

Jaemin propped his chin up with one of his hands. “I hope Jeno will be comfortable around me soon.” 

“Don’t worry, he will be,” Jisung said with a smile, reaching out shyly and patting Jaemin’s shoulder once. 

“Thanks, Sungie,” Jaemin said, grinning brightly. 

***

Jaemin hardly even flinched when the dorm’s door flew open, a loud shout of “Fellow gays, it’s time!” echoing through the room, having become accustomed to the noise by now. 

“What?” Chenle groaned from where he had fallen asleep next to Jaemin. 

“It’s time,” Donghyuck crowed, the perpetrator of the noise, shaking a plastic bag, “to dye our hair!” 

Chenle mumbled something incoherent before snuggling closer to Jaemin. Mark sighed, standing up from where he was doing school work at the dining room table. “Guys, you know Hyuck won’t let up until we do what he says.” 

“Thank you, babe,” Donghyuck grinned, running to Mark and placing a kiss on the older boy’s jaw. 

“What colors?” Jisung asked, once they were all dragged into Mark and Donghyuck’s bathroom, it being the biggest in the dorm. It was still pretty small, given the fact that Jaemin could practically feel Jeno’s breath against the back of his neck. 

“You and Lele said you wanted something different, so you’re going to get orange,” Donghyuck handed a box of dye to Jisung, “and you’re going green,” he gave a similar looking package to Chenle. 

“Are you kidding me?” Chenle grunted, peering at the dye. “I’m gonna look like grass.” 

Renjun snorted. “Don’t ask for something ‘different’ then next time.” 

Donghyuck rolled his eyes, turning to Jaemin. “Jun and Jen are going light brown and Mark hyung’s staying with black ‘cause he’s a loser.” 

Jeno with brown hair. Jaemin squealed inside. “What about you, Hyuck?” 

“Light brown too, but I bought different colors to use as streaks. Gonna try it out.” 

“You’re gonna look like a pride flag,” Renjun snorted. 

“You seem to forget I’ll all for the gays,” Donghyuck laughed. 

“What about Jaemin?” Chenle asked, raising a hand. “Is he going through the initiation process?” 

“I, the what?” Jaemin asked, confused. 

“Whenever someone moves into the dorm, they have to try a random color that we pick,” Renjun explained. 

“So what color do I get?” Jaemin asked, a little afraid. 

Donghyuck turned to him, an evil smile on his lips. “Pink.” 

***

“Okay, Chenle, c’mon out,” Donghyuck exclaimed from the living room. The boys with neutral colored hair plus Donghyuck were waiting for the other boys to come out, showcasing their ‘exciting’ colors, as the now rainbow haired boy had instructed. 

“Good luck,” Jisung whispered to his boyfriend, he and Jaemin watching as the boy left the bathroom. 

“Oh.” 

“That’s, different.” 

“He looks like a cabbage.” 

“Wow, thanks, guys.” 

“I think he looks cute!” 

”Thank you, Mark hyung!” 

Jisung and Jaemin snorted, grinning at each other. “You next?” Jaemin asked, motioning for the youngest to step forward. Jisung nodded, smiling at his hyung before leaving the room. 

“Holy shit, that’s orange.” 

“But he looks so adorable!” 

“Stop fawning over him, Hyuck.” 

“He’s my child, let me be.” 

Jaemin giggled to himself, imagining the looks on the boys’ faces. 

“Jaemin! C’mon out!” 

Jaemin glanced in the mirror, quickling patting down a few strands of his now pink hair that had gone awry before stepping out into the living room. 

“Wow, that’s _pink_ ,” Mark observed, staring at Jaemin’s hair. 

“Initiation colors are supposed to make you look stupid, but hyung looks good in everything apparently,” Chenle pouted. 

Jaemin blushed, looking at his feet. “It’s really pink, I don’t know if it suits me.” 

“Jaems, you look hot, if I wasn’t taken I would go after you,” Donghyuck whistled, but was quickly pulled onto Mark’s lap and embraced in a bear hug. Jaemin chuckled. 

“He’s right,” Renjun said, leaning back on the couch, “you look good.” 

“Thanks, Injun,” Jaemin smiled, reaching up to thread a hand through his bright hair. 

“Hyung? I think Jeno hyung’s about to pass out,” Jisung said, pointing at said boy, causing Chenle to laugh, a high pitched screeching sound. 

Jeno was staring at Jaemin with wide eyes, unblinking, his mouth hanging open slightly. Jaemin blushed, taking a second to note that Jeno looked very good with light brown hair. He wanted to run his hands through it, not in a creepy way of course. “Jeno? Are you okay?” 

“I- uh, yeah,” Jeno murmured, snapping out of his daze, face bright red. “I should get to class, yeah, I’ll see you guys, bye!” He knocked into the coffee table on his way out, Donghyuck laughing along with Chenle as he disappeared. 

“That reminded me of the Jeno in Glasses incident,” Mark snorted. 

“What?” Jaemin asked, patting at his cheeks to try and cool his blush. 

“It’s Friday evening. None of us have classes. He was just too flustered to stay here any longer,” Mark explained. 

Jaemin hid his face in his hands. “Oh my god.” 

“It proves a point though,” Donghyuck said, raising his pointer finger, “you both find each other attractive enough to run out of the dorm, ignoring your wardrobe or schedule.” 

“Shut up!” Jaemin screeched, grabbing the pillow Jisung was leaning against and throwing it at the older boy. “Just let me die in peace!” 

Donghyuck snickered, climbing out of Mark’s arms and going to Jaemin. “Only after the Nomin ship sails.” 

“The what?” 

Mark sighed. “Even I know what that is.” 

“That doesn’t help,” Jaemin whined, “what the fuck is Nomin?” 

“Let’s just say there might be a third couple in this dorm soon.” 

“Oh my _god_ , Donghyuck!”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeno lurks and somehow becomes confident, Donghyuck's past is exposed, and so is Jaemin's?

A week after the whole hair coloring incident, Jaemin came back from classes, thoroughly exhausted and about ready to fall asleep. He loved the school, but the work paired with so much therapy was taxing. Upon entering the dorm, Jaemin noted that the air seemed dry and it felt like all the energy had been drained from the rooms. Jaemin exited his and Jeno’s room after dumping his bag on the floor next to his bed, fiddling with the fraying edge of his sweater. He heard small sobs coming from Mark and Donghyuck’s room, and peeking inside, the door being cracked open, he saw that Mark was sitting on the floor, back against one of the beds, with Donghyuck curled up in his arms. 

The oldest boy was running his hands through Donghyuck’s hair, whispering what must be words of encouragement and love as the younger cried into his shirt, hands gripping the grey fabric tightly as his body shook. Mark looked like he was about to cry himself, but was holding himself together as he rubbed circles onto Donghyuck’s back. 

Jaemin backed away, not wanting to intrude on the delicate moment, going to the kitchen and opening the pantry door in search of something to stress snack on. 

“They’re really meant for each other.” 

Jaemin spun around at the sound of Jeno’s voice, spotting the boy lurking near the sink. “Sorry, I didn’t see you there.” 

“It’s okay, I didn’t mean to startle you,” Jeno replied, voice ever soft. 

“What were you saying?” Jaemin asked, grabbing a bag of tortilla chips and closing the door, focusing his attention on the older boy. 

“Donghyuck and Mark hyung. They balance each other,” Jeno said, leaning against the counter, he looked nervous, but determined to talk to Jaemin. “Donghyuck changes, he’s sort of like the sea, sometimes rough and sometimes smooth. Mark is always adapting to meet Donghyuck’s needs. In a way, they’re able to cancel each other out.” 

Jaemin nodded. That was a seemingly perfect way to describe the couple. “They’re in love, aren’t they?” 

Jeno smiled, eyes turning into crescents, and Jaemin resisted the urge to coo. “I’m surprised you haven’t noticed, they’re way more than just that.” Jaemin tilted his head to the side, confused. “They’re in love, that’s for certain. Mark hyung looks at Donghyuck like he’s the most precious thing in the world, but it’s not just that. Donghyuck lets all his insecurities come to the surface when he’s with hyung, they can truly be themselves when they’re together.” 

Jaemin hummed. “It sounds wonderful, having someone to be with like that.” 

Jeno nodded. “But they had it rough, growing up, still do. Male best friends turned to lovers doesn’t go over well in a homophobic family. Mark was never close with his parents, but Donghyuck’s family turned on him when he and hyung came out. It almost tore them apart,” Jeno said. “But in a way they’re soulmates. They always find their way back to each other, no matter what.” 

Jaemin fiddled with the bag in his hands. Donghyuck had never mentioned his family, and that was probably the reason. “That’s terrible, not having the support of your family.” 

“Donghyuck has always said that though he wishes his parents approved, being himself has always been most important to him. And the fact that that involves Mark hyung makes him virtually unstoppable. Hyuck truly is a force of nature,” Jeno said, smiling. 

Jaemin grinned. “That he is.” 

“I was wondering if you wanted to watch _Soul Eater_ with me?” Jeno asked, looking extremely nervous but also strangely hopeful. 

“Of course,” Jaemin agreed, smiling. “Let’s do this.” He followed Jeno to the couch, sitting beside the older boy and popping open the bag of chips as Jeno turned on the tv. 

“Have you ever watched this anime before?” Jeno asked, stealing a chip from the bag in Jaemin’s hands, making the boy grin. 

“No,” Jaemin replied, “I’ve never watched anime.” 

Jeno turned to him wide eyed, half chewed chip resting in the pocket of his cheek, making him look like a chipmunk. “What?” 

Jaemin giggled. “I didn’t watch that much tv growing up. My mom always wanted me to stay on top of my classes.” 

Jeno nodded, fiddling with the remote. “And is that what you wanted?” 

Jaemin froze. No one had ever asked him that. “I-I guess maybe I was doing it for my dad? He died when I was young and I always wanted to make him proud, he was my role model.” 

“You never answered the question.” 

Jaemin stared into Jeno’s dark eyes. “N-No,” he breathed, and suddenly felt like a weight was pulled from his chest. “I wanted to focus on studying dance and music. But my mother wanted me to have a well-rounded education.” 

Jeno smiled. “You dance?” 

Jaemin smiled faintly, shying away from Jeno. “I took a class after school for a semester, but I had to drop it because it took up too much of my time.” 

“Jaemin?” Jeno bent down slightly to catch the younger’s eyes again. 

Jaemin silently wondered how Jeno found all this confidence. “Yeah?” 

Jeno smiled, eyes turning into crescents. “I’m really glad you told me. About your dad, and about dancing.” 

Jaemin grinned back. “I am too.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Renjun and Jaemin have a talk and some cliche Nomin fluff (finally). AN: Happy Valentine's Day everyone!!

“I saw you and Jeno on the couch yesterday,” Renjun said. “Actually more like Jisung saw you who told Chenle who told me.” They were in his room, Renjun writing some report on global issues at his desk and Jaemin playing Angry Birds on his phone, perched on the older boy’s bed. Donghyuck and Mark still hadn’t left their room and Jeno was in his room, so only half of the '00 line was present. 

“And?” 

Renjun closed his computer. “Jeno likes you.” 

“Shut up,” Jaemin said, rolling his eyes. “I wish.” 

“So you do like him.” 

“It’s weird seeing you act like a thirteen year old middle school gossip,” Jaemin groaned. 

Renjun grunted. “Yeah, yeah, you don’t like him, whatever.” 

Jaemin flopped backwards onto the bed. “If you don’t mind me asking, is Hyuckie okay?” 

“His mental health is part of who he is, just like mine is part of me and yours is part of you,” Renjun sighed. “We all have our up and down moments. For Hyuck, his down moments are extreme. He loathes it, doesn’t like being around us when he has bad days, only Mark hyung can break through to him.” 

Jaemin bit his lip. “Is there anything I can do?” 

“Just stay happy and healthy for when he gets feeling better,” Renjun said. “Donghyuck hates seeing anyone hurting.” 

“He’s too kind.” 

Renjun bit his lip, fiddling with a pencil. “He really is.” 

Jaemin rolled onto his side so he could look at Renjun. “Hey, could I ask you something?” 

Renjun nodded, grabbing a tin of silly putty and cracking it open. Renjun always seemed to have something in his hands to fidget with. “Of course.” 

“I was wondering about your insomnia,” Jaemin said carefully, “like is it just the chemicals in your brain being off, or is it more?” 

Renjun tilted his head towards the ceiling, stretching the putty out. “I was raised for most of my life by my aunt. She always seemed healthy, worked out, ate well, you name it. But one morning when I was twelve she didn’t wake me up on time for school. I thought that maybe she had just slept in, but when I went to wake her,” he smiled gently at Jaemin. “Let’s just say she didn’t wake up.” 

“Jun, I’m so sorry,” Jaemin breathed. 

Renjun waved a hand. “It’s okay, I grieved for her and I’ve come to an understanding that she’s gone, but the fear that someone else I love will die while they’re sleeping keeps me awake. It’s complicated.” 

Jaemin nodded, feeling tears prickle in his eyes. “I’m sorry.” 

Renjun smiled, standing up and dropping the puddy onto his desk, plopping onto his bed next to Jaemin. “Don’t cry for me, Jaemin,” he said, “just understand that everyone here has more of a backstory than they let on. I’m sure Jen told you about Mark hyung and Donghyuck.” 

Jaemin nodded. “Yeah. I, I guess I just wish I could take pain away from people? I know that’s a naive thing to say.” 

Renjun chuckled. “Pain is what shapes us, just as much as happiness. Without sadness, fear, grief, resentment, all of those deemed ‘ugly’ emotions, we wouldn’t have any backbone. You learn from hurt too. Feeling negativity, being scared, it makes you who you are.” 

Jaemin nodded, eyes wet as he looked at the older boy. “Jun, will you please hold me? I need to be close to someone.” 

Renjun immediately wrapped his arms around Jaemin. “Don’t feel alone, Jaemin. ‘Cause you aren’t.” 

Jaemin smiled. “I haven’t felt alone since the minute you and Hyuck first greeted me.” 

“Good.” 

***

“Hey.” 

Jaemin flipped over in his bed to look at Jeno, who was standing near his own. He was wearing the cause of Jaemin’s death: his glasses. “H-Hey yourself.” 

“I was wondering if you wanted to go out?” 

Jaemin stared at him in shock. 

“No, I mean, like out to the gardens,” Jeno rushed out, face bright red. “There’s a meteor shower happening tonight and I thought you might want to see it. For scientific purposes.” 

Jaemin grinned. “For scientific purposes. Sure, Jeno.” 

“O-Okay, I’ll just go wash up,” he said, practically running into the bathroom. 

Not ten minutes later, Jeno and Jaemin were in the gardens, Jeno having led the younger boy to a secluded spot, free of any trees that might block the night sky. It was dark already as Jeno laid out a blanket on the ground for them to sit on, the only light coming from the moon and the windows of the school building. Hardly enough to see anything clearly by, but Jaemin could make out Jeno’s form, gesturing for him to sit. 

“When will it start?” Jaemin asked, sitting beside Jeno, the boy unconsciously tensing. Jaemin tried to hide his hurt. 

“Maybe five minutes or so? We got here right in time.” Jeno smiled at Jaemin, the younger boy’s heart doing flips. 

It started with a trail of light across the sky, followed by more until the sky was filled with flashes of white. “It’s beautiful,” Jaemin murmured, lying on his back as to get a better view, stretching out a hand towards the display as if he could touch the stars. 

“Yeah, beautiful.” 

Jaemin looked over at Jeno, the older boy staring back at him, a blush on his cheeks. “Look at the stars, you nitwit,” Jaemin said, pink coloring his face. 

“Okay.” 

They couldn’t look away from each other, as if some force was keeping their eyes locked. 

“Jeno, if you don’t stop, I’m afraid-” Jaemin trailed off as Jeno leaned closer. 

“Afraid of what?” 

“I’ll scare you away,” Jaemin whispered, eyes wet. “And I really don’t want to do that.” 

Jeno closed his eyes, letting out a small sigh. “I’m not completely better, and I want to be the best version of myself I can be for you.” 

“But this means you’re interested?” Jaemin asked, letting himself be a tiny bit selfish. 

“Yeah,” Jeno breathed, studying his face. 

They both pretended to be oblivious to the fact that their pinkies were intertwined the rest of the night.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jisung and Jaemin bond over pancakes, Renjun is Done, & ot7 reappears

“Hey, Sungie, where is everyone?” 

Jisung looked up from his phone at Jaemin who was going through the kitchen cabinets to find himself breakfast. “They all had early classes, except for Donghyuck hyung who went to therapy.” 

“Ah,” Jaemin hummed, grabbing a box of cereal and a bowl. “And what are you doing, Jisungie?” 

“Saving your ass from getting sick again,” Jisung said, darting in front of Jaemin and grabbing the carton of milk from his hands, sticking it back in the refrigerator. “I’m not gonna be here by myself if you decide to puke your guts out. Wait for the hyungs to be around when you do that.” 

“Yah,” Jaemin said, nudging Jisung with his shoulder, “don’t talk to your hyung like that!” 

Jisung snickered, grabbing a bowl from one of the cupboards. “Let’s make pancakes, hyung.” 

Jaemin smiled at the boy who was innocently looking for the ingredients for pancake mix in the pantry. “Yeah, lets.” 

***

“No, hyung, two eggs, not three!” 

“Jisung, look at the directions!” 

“It literally says two, hyung, don’t crack that egg, no no no no-” 

“What in the _fuck_ is going on in here!” 

Jaemin and Jisung turned around to face the other five inhabitants of the dorm, Jisung’s shirt wet where Jaemin had accidentally splashed him with soy milk, some egg shell in his hair. Jaemin didn’t look much better, with flour streaked across his face and some brand of dairy-free butter smeared over the sleeve of his black shirt. They were both doused in cinnamon, which turned their hair brown. “Hi?” 

Renjun groaned, passing a hand over his face. “You know what, I just came from a long foreign politics lecture and I’m not able to deal with this right now.” He marched off to his room, leaving the other six boys. 

“We tried making pancakes,” Jaemin said, gesturing to the partially destroyed kitchen behind him. 

“Key word being ‘tried,’” Chenle muttered under his breath. 

“Hey, it was hyung who wasn’t reading the instructions right,” Jisung complained, pushing Jaemin lightly. 

“And who was the one who thought hitting a stick of ‘Can't Believe it's Not Butter’ with a meat tenderizer would work better than melting it? And why is there even a meat tenderizer here?” Jaemin rebuked. 

It was Donghyuck who started laughing first, small giggles turning into loud laughter, all six of them finding themselves bent over at the waist as they laughed. “You two are a mess,” Donghyuck cried, shuffling forward to ruffle Jisung’s dirty hair, much the the boy’s chagrin. 

“Hi, Hyuck,” Jaemin said when the older boy was in front of him. “I missed you.” 

Donghyuck grinned widely, tears springing to his eyes, welcoming Jaemin into a flour-y hug. “I missed you too.” 

“How are you feeling?” 

Donghyuck smiled, pulling back. “I’ve been better.” 

Jisung broke the small reunion with a sneeze, cinnamon floating in a haze around him. “You better clean up and then go shower ‘cause I’m not touching you until you don’t smell like egg,” Chenle said, crossing his arms at Jisung who saluted, turning to the kitchen. 

Donghyuck smiled, walking back to Mark and waving at Jaemin as they disappeared into their room, promising to come to family dinner time later, with Chenle departing soon after. 

Jeno coughed, catching Jaemin’s attention and grinned at him. “You have a bit of flour,” he reached forward and brushed some of the powder off of Jaemin’s nose, the younger boy’s skin darkening under his touch. 

“T-Thanks,” he whispered, meeting Jeno’s eyes. 

“Yah, stop flirting and come help me!” Jisung shouted, making Jaemin jump. 

“Brat, mind your own business!” Jaemin called back. 

Jeno giggled. “I’ll see you tonight at dinner? I have a class now,” he said, gesturing to the door. 

Jaemin hummed, nodding. “Yes.” 

“I’ll look forward to it, then,” Jeno said, hooking their pinkies together and walking backwards as far as he could until their fingers broke apart. “Bye, Jaemin.” 

Jaemin watched as Jeno left, cheeks bright red. “Jeno and Jaemin, sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g.” 

“Jisung, I swear to god!” 

***

“So there’s one minor issue,” Chenle said, standing at the head of the table. 

“We didn’t sneak in food,” Renjun groaned, banging his head against the wood. 

“What do we do?” Jisung whined, leaning against Jeno. 

Jaemin sighed, standing up and going to the pantry. He grabbed two boxes of pop-tarts, a can of pringles, seven protein shakes, and a jar of red vines before walking back to the table and depositing the items. “We improvise.” 

“This is disgusting,” Mark said, watching as Jaemin ripped open a package of pop-tarts, stuffing one in his mouth and giving the other to Donghyuck. 

“Do you want to starve or not?” Jeno said, punching his best friend in the arm. “Lighten up, hyung.” 

“Look who’s saying that,” Chenle giggled, a redvine in each hand. 

“Shut up,” Jeno grumbed, sticking a straw in a chocolate protein shake and handing it to Jaemin, both of them blushing at the round of “awws,” the gesture invoked. 

As the other boys settled in, Jaemin watched as Donghyuck bit his lip, whispering a few things into Mark's ear, eyes worried. Mark just smiled, lacing their fingers together, but Donghyuck only returned the look after he had tucked a protein drink into Mark's hand. Jaemin flinched, feeling idiotic for not remembering. 

“So, Hyuck, how are you doing?” Renjun asked after finishing a heated debate with Jeno about whether twizzlers or red vines were better, biting into a pringle. 

Donghyuck shrugged, leaning his head comfortably against Mark’s shoulder. “I feel so sleepy, like I don’t do much besides cry and rest during Bad Days but I just get so tired afterwards.” 

“Emotions are exhausting,” Chenle said, shrugging. 

“Listen to Lele,” Mark whispered, pressing a kiss to Donghyuck’s hair. 

“Why do you stay with me, hyung?” Donghyuck asked suddenly, all the chit chat falling silent. “I feel so so ugly when I’m down, inside and out, why do you stay?” 

“You know my answer,” Mark said, brushing Donghyuck’s hair out of his eyes. 

“I-I just feel like I need to hear it all the time,” Donghyuck whimpered, “it’s selfish, I'm selfish, I know.” 

Mark chuckled, cupping his boyfriend’s cheek. “You aren’t selfish, Hyuck. I stay with you, I’ve always stayed with you, because you’re the one who protects me, makes me feel safe, gives me somewhere to belong, something to be. You’re the most important thing in my life, the someone I’m willing to die for, and most of all, live for,” he wiped away Donghyuck’s tears that had emerged at some point during his words. “Dying for something is hard. But living for something, when everything could be so much easier if we didn’t try to fight all of this, stigma, our mental health, that means much more. I _love_ you, Donghyuck. I always will.” 

Donghyuck cried as Mark kissed his forehead, hugging him so tightly that it would be impossible to pry them apart. Renjun was not so inconspicuously wiping at his eyes while Chenle and Jisung held each other. Jaemin felt something brush his hand under the table and looking next to him he saw Jeno, a soft smile playing on his lips. He bumped his hand against Jaemin’s again and the younger boy blinked away his tears, grabbing his hand. 

Looking across the table, Mark still was wrapped around Donghyuck, like he was protecting the smaller from the world. Jaemin looked up at Jeno, lips curving upwards. “Soulmates,” he whispered, lacing his fingers with Jeno’s. 

“Soulmates,” the older boy repeated, giving Jaemin’s hand a squeeze.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lil fluff before things go downhill (oops)

“Wow,” Jaemin whispered as Jeno guided him into the library. The building was large, the bottom floor full of couches and had bookcases lining the walls, sunlight flickering in through the stained glass windows. The upper floor was like a balcony, wrapping around the inside of the library with a view of the bottom floor. The stacks were up there, comfortable leather couches and chairs peeking out from behind the rows of books. 

“It’s one of my favorite places on campus,” Jeno said, “surprisingly few people come in here.” 

“How is that possible?” Jaemin asked, glancing around. “This is like a dream, even if you don’t like reading. I can’t believe I’ve never been here, I’ve been living at this school for over a month.” 

Jeno chuckled, grabbing Jaemin’s wrist. “I want to show you something.” 

Jaemin let himself be pulled up the small staircase to the top floor, trailing behind the older boy as he took him deeper into the stacks. “I feel like I could get lost in here.” 

“I’ll make sure you don’t lose your way,” Jeno laughed, tugging Jaemin along. Turning down a row of books, he made another right before stopping. “Here.” 

Jaemin felt all the breath leave him. ‘Here’ was a space between the bookshelves and the outer wall, two plush couches facing each other with an ornate lamp on a table beside one of them, the stained glass window casting rainbows onto the floor. “It’s so beautiful,” Jaemin breathed, Jeno letting go of his wrist so that he could walk to the window, looking out into the grounds. “How did you find this place?” 

“I was looking for a hiding place one day, everything had gotten so loud and I needed to be alone. Somehow I found myself up here, and I come here whenever I’m feeling like I can’t handle life.” 

“But if it’s your special place, why would you show it to me?” Jaemin asked, sitting down on one of the couches, Jeno following suit. 

“It’s not that no one knows,” Jeno said, “Mark hyung does. But I wanted you to see it because,” he faced Jaemin, biting his lip. “I-I trust you.” 

“Jeno,” Jaemin breathed, lips turning upwards. 

The older boy scratched the back of his neck nervously. “I just wanted you to know.” 

Jaemin grinned, reaching forward to place his hand on top of Jeno’s. “Thank you. I promise I’ll keep this place secret.” 

Jeno beamed back, eyes turning into crescents. “Thanks, Jaemin.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shit hits the fan [part one] Trigger warning: depressive episode

Jaemin sighed, ignoring Renjun’s knocking on the door to his room, tugging his pillow from underneath his head to grip it to his chest, the fabric growing damp from his tears. His mind was blank and fuzzy and he wanted nothing more than to be swallowed up by a sinkhole and never have to walk or eat or talk or just move again. He felt so _hopeless_ that it was paralyzing. 

“Jaemin, I’m coming in,” Renjun shouted, and not a second later the door opened. “Jeno’s already at class, so he’s not here to come check on you- Jaeminie?” Jaemin felt the bed dip beside him. “Jaemin, you aren’t feeling well, are you.” A shake of the head. “Are you going to hurt yourself?” Renjun paused. “Sorry, I have to ask, I need to know if we need to get you to a counselor right away.” 

Jaemin shook his head in response, burying his nose into the pillow. “Okay, that’s good,” Renjun said. “Can I do anything for you?” 

Jaemin looked towards Jeno’s bed. “Can I have his pillow, please?” 

Renjun nodded. “Yeah, I’m sure he won’t mind at all.” 

A few minutes later, per Jaemin’s request, the boy was alone again, this time hugging Jeno’s pillow close to him. Jaemin sucked in a breath, the weight of the oxygen burning his throat. He let out the breath slowly, out and out until there was no more air for him to breathe, his lungs aching to pull in a breath but he held out, closing his eyes and imagining all the good in him draining from his body. 

He laid still, chest on fire. 

And then it was over; Jaemin breathed in, cold air scalding his throat and bringing tears of hatred and sadness to his eyes. He buried his face in Jeno’s pillow and _cried._

***

“Hey, Jaems?” 

Jaemin shook himself fully awake from where he had fallen into a light nap, looking at Jeno with large and blotchy eyes. The older boy looked on edge and concerned, gnawing on his bottom lip and tugging at the hem of his school sweater. 

“Aren’t you supposed to be in class?” Jaemin asked, voice rusty. 

“Yeah,” Jeno said, twisting the fabric around one finger. "I wanted to check on you." 

“Oh.” 

Jaemin stared at the older boy, tears building up in his eyes again. “Jeno?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Will you,” Jaemin took a breath, feeling a tear roll down his cheek, “will you please lay down with me?” 

He instantly knew he made a mistake, watching as Jeno’s body tensed. But then he heard a small “yeah,” and Jeno was crawling into bed next to him, all awkward and not touching the younger, but Jaemin could feel his comforting presence all the same. 

“Thank you, Jeno,” he whispered, looking up into the boy’s dark eyes. 

“Of course, Nana.” Jaemin smiled at the nickname, cheeks still wet with tears, eyelids heavy as he drifted off to sleep. 

***

“Guys, wake up.” 

Jaemin’s eyes fluttered open upon hearing Donghyuck’s soft voice. He spied the boy near the door, smiling gently at him. Jaemin gave him a small nod before closing his eyes again and burying his face into the curve of Jeno’s neck. 

Jeno. 

His eyes immediately shot open, all thoughts of sleep gone as he stared at the sleeping boy that he was _cuddling._ Jaemin had his hands fisted in the rough material of Jeno’s school issued sweater, and the older boy’s arms were wrapped comfortably around his waist. This was definitely not the position in which Jaemin had fallen asleep. 

He mouthed a silent “help me” to Donghyuck who just shrugged, looking amused. If Jaemin was in his right mind he would have thrown a pillow at the boy, but here he was in his I’m-really-sad-and-depressed-and-have-a-sleeping-Lee-Jeno-aka-my-crush-attached-to-me mind. 

“Jeno,” Jaemin whispered, trying to wiggle free to the boy’s arms but had no such luck. “Jeno, please wake up.” 

After a minute of poking the boy (Jeno slept like the dead), he rubbed his cheek against Jaemin’s hair, reminding the younger of a cat, before his eyes opened. 

A silent minute passed before Jeno jolted away from Jaemin, cheeks flaming and stuttering apologies. “Really, Jen, it’s okay,” Jaemin said, trying to calm the boy, “it’s okay.” 

“I’m so sorry, Jaemin,” he whispered, looking so shaken and frightened, eyes large and lips wobbling as if he was expecting a harsh rejection. 

Jaemin carefully reached forward, touching the older boy’s chin. “Jen, if I didn’t want you hugging me, I would have shoved you off the bed. I promise you that I’m okay.” 

Jeno shyly nodded and leaned the tiniest bit into Jaemin’s touch. 

“While this is all very cute, but Jaems, a therapist is gonna come here to your room to talk. He should be here in about two minutes.” Donghyuck gave the boys a thumbs up before leaving. 

“Do they often come to your room to have a session?” Jaemin asked Jeno, both of them sitting up. Jeno wrapped the quilt around the younger boy, securing him in a blanket burrito and making them both smile shyly. 

“Only if you’re having a really bad day and can’t make it out of your dorm,” Jeno replied, pulling away and straightening his sweater. “Renjun and Donghyuck were really worried, Jun called the office to schedule you something right after he came in to wake you up. They also spammed the group chat,” Jeno pointed to Jaemin’s phone that was powered down. 

“I feel bad,” Jaemin whispered, playing with the hem of the blanket, “for worrying you all.” 

“Nana, in no way should you feel bad about affecting us. It’s important that you get help to process everything. Don’t worry about us.” Jeno scooted closer to Jaemin, carefully touching his wrist that was peeking out from the blanket. Jaemin let his hand fall from his side, Jeno catching it in his own. 

Jaemin smiled up at Jeno, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. “Thank you, Jen, you’re so kind.” 

Jeno looked like he was about to reply when someone knocked on the door, breaking the silence. “Can I come in?” 

At Jaemin’s affirmative ‘yes’ as short man entered the room, a bag slung over his shoulder. “Hey, you must be Jaemin,” he greeted, before his eyes fell on Jeno. “Jeno, I didn’t know you would be here!” 

“Hi, hyung,” Jeno greeted, giving the man a small smile, “I should really leave you two be,” the man nodded and Jeno stood up. “I’ll talk to you soon, Nana.” And then he was gone, placing Jaemin’s hand down on the bed carefully. 

“I’m Ahnjong,” the man greeted, giving Jaemin a warm smile as he sat down in Jeno’s desk chair, wheeling it closer. “As you could probably tell, I work with Jeno on occasion.” 

Jaemin nodded, eyes unconsciously looking towards the door. 

“You wish Jeno was still here.” 

“What?” Jaemin asked, looking back at the man. 

Ahnjong smiled. “I’ve never seen Jeno so affectionate with anyone, not even his other roommates. And looking at your record I’ve noticed you’ve only been here a little over a month. It seems like you’re helping him figure out how to deal with his anxieties about being around people. And from the look on your face it seems like he’s doing something for you as well.” 

“I wouldn’t say that,” Jaemin murmured, clasping his hands together, “he doesn't seem entirely comfortable around me.” 

“You’ve done more than you think, Jaemin,” Ahnjong said, “but anyhow, let’s talk about you. Can you tell me what’s gotten you so down today?” 

Jaemin shrugged. “I guess I just woke up feeling like my world was ending. I haven’t hurt myself in years, I’ve trained my mind not to think about that, but now it’s like I have no outlet?” he looked up at Ahnjong who nodded at him to continue. “I just f-feel so _sad,_ just so sad that it’s crippling, I can’t move, it’s like I’m bogged down in a pool, I just lay there and cry and stew in my mind and e-everything is just so so numb,” Jaemin was sobbing, shoulders shaking as he hid his face in his hands. 

“Jaemin, I need you to take some deep breaths for me, okay?” 

The boy followed Ahnjong’s words and after a few minutes managed to take several shaky breaths. 

“There we go,” Ahnjong said, handing Jaemin a tissue box from Jeno’s desk. “So, your depression causes you to just freeze up, in a way?” Jaemin nodded. “Is there anything that has helped you in the past?” 

“I guess reading, playing games on my phone, being with my mum if she was home, I never had friends I could talk to back home because I was so busy with school,” Jaemin wiped away a few tears. “I guess I have books and games with me now.” 

“You can always go to the library here,” Ahnjong suggested, “or go out to the gardens and take a walk. I know you must be missing your mom, but there are six boys who are more than willing to look out for you while you’re here and have the potential to become lifelong friends.” 

“You think they really care that much?” Jaemin asked, brow furrowed. 

“Yes,” Ahnjong said, smiling. “And I already think you know that they do. Now, I have to get to another meeting, but call the desk if you’re feeling like this again and I or someone else will come by as soon as possible, and make sure to make an appointment for a counselor tomorrow if you can’t make it to class again.” Jaemin nodded. “As for today, for the rest of it anyways, try making the bed and going out to the common area to start your day, I know you probably don’t want to hear it, but the air in here is a bit stuffy,” Ahnjong chuckled, Jaemin hiding a tiny smile. 

“Thank you.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nomin time uwu & welcome to Family Monopoly Night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to put in some nomin before more angst so here ya go.

“How are you feeling?” 

Jaemin looked up from where he was tucked between Donghyuck and Renjun on the couch, who were both fast asleep, meeting Jeno’s concerned eyes. “Sad. Missing you,” he whispered, letting out a breathy chuckle at the look on the older boy’s face in response to his words. “You give good cuddles.” 

Jeno blushed, but stretched out a hand. “I was going to go take a nap, and i-if you wanted to join me I wouldn’t be opposed.” He scratched the back of his neck with his other hand, a nervous tick. 

Jaemin felt a smile dance on his lips, taking Jeno’s hand and lacing their fingers together, making sure to not wake the other two boys when he stood up. He looked around the room as Jeno led him away, briefly meeting Jisung’s eyes who gave him a smile and a small wave before returning to petting Chenle’s hair, all the other boys enjoying their siesta. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t come back right after your appointment with Ahnjong hyung, I had a class,” Jeno said as Jaemin snuck under the covers of the older boy’s bed. “I would’ve been back earlier if I could have been.” 

“I know,” Jaemin replied, tapping the spot in the bed next to him and smiling when Jeno laid down next to him, flat on his back. “Thank you for everything, Jeno, you’ve done so much for me.” 

Jeno looked over at him, finding Jaemin’s hand and squeezing it. “Thank you, Jaemin. You’ve given me time to open up to you, just given me the space that I needed to come to terms with myself.” 

“Needed?” Jaemin asked, brow furrowed. 

“I-I guess I just feel better about myself,” Jeno said, searching Jaemin’s eyes. “I’m far from loving myself, but I want to, I want to be happy and open and not afraid anymore.” 

Jaemin smiled, happiness for the boy outweighing his own darkness. “I’m so happy for you, Jen.” 

“Jaemin?” 

Jaemin shuffled closer to lay his head near Jeno’s shoulder. “Hm?” 

“It’s my turn to wait for you, so take as long as you need.” 

Jaemin’s lips twitched and he threw his free arm over Jeno’s chest, rubbing his thumb over Jeno’s knuckles. “Okay.” 

***

“I want to be the hat.” 

“No, you and Mark hyung are the shoe.” 

Donghyuck groaned, making grabby hands at the Monopoly piece in Renjun’s hands, Mark keeping him secure in his lap with his arms around the younger’s waist. “Hyuck, Jun can be the hat, we were the hat last time.” 

“But hyung,” Donghyuck whined, pouting. 

“Nope.” 

“Can we actually play?” Jisung asked, his head in Chenle’s lap as he observed the playing board. 

“Yes, please,” Jeno said, playing with Jaemin’s fingers, the younger sitting close, their shoulders touching. It had been a few days since Jaemin’s episode, and the boys had decided to have a Family Monopoly Night. 

“Fine,” Donghyuck huffed, “let Monopoly-as-teams-except-Renjun-cause-he’s-a-hermit commence.” 

With an eye-roll from Renjun, Chenle started, quickly buying up Baltic Avenue much to his teammate/boyfriend’s displeasure. 

“Is this usually how this goes?” Jaemin whispered to Jeno an hour later, Mark arguing with Jisung about the price of Boardwalk and Chenle throwing fake money in Donghyuck’s face, Renjun somewhere in the kitchen making chamomile tea to “calm his nerves.” 

“Mhm,” Jeno replied, squeezing his hand. “Never a dull moment.” 

“That’s for sure,” Jaemin giggled, turning to bury his nose in the crook of Jeno’s neck, Jeno sucking in a tense breath before relaxing under Jaemin’s touch. “I like it, though. How did you manage, when you first came here? With your anxiety and everything?” 

“It was hard,” Jeno responded, lips touching Jaemin’s hair, “I acted a lot like how I did when you first came. Always on edge, leaving the room if I could. But then Hyuck came to me.” Jaemin could hear a smile in his voice. “Hyuck said that there would always be fears in my life, in anyone’s life, but fears can always be fought, and when they are, there’s a silver lining. He said I could be afraid of him, them, but there would always be a part of me that wondered what happiness could have come out of a friendship with them if I didn’t try.” 

“You’re so strong,” Jaemin whispered, soft breaths hitting Jeno’s skin. “I envy you.” 

“Hyuck’s the strong one,” Jeno chuckled. “I just decided to do what he suggested.” 

“And that required bravery and strength,” Jaemin replied, lips ghosting over the skin of Jeno’s neck, the older boy shivering in response. “I’m so proud.” 

“I’m proud of you, too. For seeing the counselor that day, being in a bad spot can be hard to get out of, and I’m glad it only took you a few days to feel better.” 

Jaemin was about to reply when he heard Donghyuck speak. “Guys, I just got a text message.” 

“And?” 

“It’s from my mother,” Donghyuck breathed, face pale as he stared at his phone, only looking up when Mark pulled it away. Then everything happened quickly, Chenle found Jisung’s hand as the younger boy pulled him close and hid his face in the younger’s chest, Renjun sat down on the couch hard, and Jeno’s face turned an ashy color. Instead of turning to Mark, like Jaemin was expecting, Donghyuck stood up, expressionless, walking to the door and slipping out of the dorm. Mark buried his head in his hands, heaving out a long sigh. 

Jaemin stayed quiet, not sure of what to say or do.


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ( ╥ω╥ )

“Jen, what was that,” Jaemin asked, sitting on his bed as Jeno dug through his closet in search of a sweater. “Why’d everyone freeze up when Hyuck told us about the text?” 

Jeno sighed, turning to face Jaemin. “You know when I told you about Mark and Hyuck’s past?” Jaemin nodded. “Remember when I told you about Hyuck’s family?” 

“Oh,” Jaemin whispered, the bed dipping as Jeno sat down beside him. “What happens now?” 

“Hyuck’s mom only messages Donghyuck when she’s coming to visit him. Which is rare, and when it does happen, it usually results in some bad things happening.” 

“Can I,” Jaemin sighed, “nevermind, it’s not my place.” 

“You want to know what happened when Mark and Hyuck came out, don’t you,” Jeno asked, rubbing Jaemin’s knee. “Hyuckie and Mark trust you, don’t worry. And I think it’s best that you know what happened since she’s coming here.” 

Jaemin nodded and Jeno stood up, walking to his desk and grabbing a stress ball. “I guess it all started when Mark and Hyuckie met in school. They bonded instantly and everyone thought they were close friends. When they figured out it was more than just friendship they wanted, Hyuck was thirteen and Mark hyung was fourteen.” 

“So young,” Jaemin whispered, playing with his fingers. 

“What can I say, they love each other more than anything,” Jeno chuckled, staring at his socks. “It was almost three years later of hiding that Donghyuck’s dad walked in on them kissing in Hyuck’s room. It was a disaster,” Jeno sighed, squeezing the stress ball harshly. “He threw Mark out of the house and yelled at Hyuckie. A lot.” 

“What the fuck,” Jaemin murmured, blinking back tears. 

Jeno bit his lip, shaking his head. “When Hyuck’s mother found out what had happened, everything was ten times worse. She took Hyuck out of school and started homeschooling him so that he wouldn’t be prone to ‘bad influences.’ She took away his phone so he couldn’t contact Mark hyung,” Jeno continued, sitting down next to Jaemin and pulling him close as the younger cried. “Please don’t cry, I’ll stop now, I don’t want to hurt you.” 

“No, please continue,” Jaemin whispered, wiping away his tears. 

“What must have been a good month later, Hyuck’s parents were both out of the house and he somehow found Mark. Hyuck found out Mark hyung’s parents hadn stopped talking to him. Somewhere along the lines he had stopped eating as well, that was when he first developed his eating disorder.” Jaemin nodded, frowning. “They were planning to run away together but Hyuck’s parents found out.” 

“This is like a movie script,” Jaemin murmured, laying his head against Jeno’s shoulder, “I can hardly believe something like this would happen in real life.” 

“Movies are based off of stories, aren’t they. It makes you think,” Jeno replied. “But yeah, if it wasn’t Hyuck and hyung’s story I almost wouldn’t have believed it.” 

“How did they find each other again? What happened after they were found?” Jaemin asked, snuggling closer to Jeno. 

“It took time. Donghyuck went through so much more, he stopped sleeping, that was his first mania phase. And one time his mother caught him looking at pictures of him and Mark,” Jeno took a shaky breath, “when he said he missed him she slapped him.” 

Jaemin stiffened, tears clouding his eyes. “She hurt Hyuck?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Jeno, why is she coming here?” Jaemin asked, the older boy rubbing his back soothingly. 

“Even though she believes that Hyuck has gone down the wrong path, he’s still her son.” Jaemin sighed, securing his arms around Jeno’s waist. “When Donghyuck and Mark met again, it was at this school. Totally unplanned. But their families didn’t know that both of them were here. They still don’t know.” 

“Shit.” 

“Yeah. Mark hides when Hyuck’s parents come and vice versa. The other four of us have all met their parents, and Hyuck’s mom has done nothing but insult each of us when she comes. That’s why we reacted the way we did. She dislikes me because I don’t talk hardly at all when she’s around, she thinks I’m being rude, and she despises Renjun for some reason. Once she caught Chenle and Jisung holding hands and yelled at them for a straight hour. They were able to pass it off as platonic, but Jisung was shaken up for an entire week. Didn’t talk to anyone.” 

“Why is she so cruel,” Jaemin shook, tears leaving damp patches on Jeno’s shirt. 

“I don’t know,” Jeno whispered, “I honestly don’t know.” 

Jaemin closed his eyes, laying down and pulling Jeno with him, cuddling close to the older boy's chest. "D-Don't go tonight, stay here?" 

Jeno smiled into Jaemin's hair. "I won't leave." 

***

“Yo.” 

Jaemin rolled over in his bed, blinking at the sudden light from the blinds being shoved open, his alarm reading seven in the morning. The spot next to him where he knew Jeno had slept was empty. Looking up he was met with Donghyuck's sad eyes. “Hyuck?” 

Said boy, instigator of the sunlight, sat down on Jaemin’s bed. “C’mon, get up, I need you today.” Jaemin immediately nodded, willing to do anything for the boy after what he had heard from Jeno last night, even wake up so early on a Sunday morning. "Jeno was called in to talk to a teacher about some schedule change, that's why he's not here," Donghyuck explained. 

Jaemin nodded, sad that he wouldn't get to see Jeno right away, but hurried to tug on a hoodie. “Where are you taking me?” he asked once he was dressed, Donghyuck pulling him out of the dorm. 

“The gardens,” Donghyuck replied, squeezing Jaemin’s hand tightly. “Is that okay?” 

“Yeah,” Jaemin nodded, still a little bit sleepy. Donghyuck pulled him out into the yards, heading to a small gazebo and plunking down on one of the benches, Jaemin following suit. 

“Thanks for coming with me,” Donghyuck said, smiling sadly at Jaemin. “God, I love Mark and the boys, I’ll do anything for them, but my mother has affected them all in one way or another and I can’t bear to see their faces when she’s mentioned. I assume Jeno told you about my history.” 

Jaemin nodded. “I didn’t want to pry, I was just concerned.” 

Donghyuck shrugged. “It’s fine, it’s good that you know. It’s just not easy to process. For Mark and I and for anyone else.” 

“Yeah,” Jaemin whispered. “I’m sorry, Hyuck.” 

“Don’t say sorry,” Donghyuck said, patting Jaemin’s thigh. “Sorry is an overused word. And I, for one, am far from sorry that my past was and is difficult. Sure, it is painful, but that pain shaped me to be the person I am, taught me to never give up on what I love, because no matter what the universe throws at me, I’ve always found a way, and always will.” 

Jaemin nodded, tilting his head to rest on Donghyuck’s shoulder. “That sounds a lot like something Renjun said to me.” Donghyuck hummed, putting an arm around the younger. 

“Jaemin?” 

“Mhm?” 

“Promise me you’ll always fight for who you are and what you love. Promise me you’ll _never_ give up, because you’ll not only lose yourself, but you’ll lose what you hold dear.” 

Jaemin laced his fingers with Donghyuck’s, feeling the older boy’s tears fall onto their joined hands. “I promise.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Microwaves and Mothers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long!! I'm moving plus I've been sick so I haven't felt up to writing/posting. Hope you enjoy~~

“He didn’t mean to set it on fire, it just sorta happened.” 

The maintenance lady, Eunji, ran a hand over her face. “Jaemin, how does someone unintentionally leave tinfoil in a microwave?” 

“He’s Chenle?” 

She shook her head, resigned, but Jaemin could see a smile pulling at the corners of her lips. Eunji had always had a soft spot for the six, now seven boys. “I’ll be up to install a new one later today, now you should really head off to class.” 

“Thank you so much,” Jaemin grinned, waving at the woman until she was out of view. “Next time I won’t pull the short straw,” he muttered under his breath, walking down the large hallway, past the doors to the dining hall, “Chenle can fix his own problems.” 

“Excuse me,” a female voice called, and Jaemin glanced to the side, spotting a middle aged woman crouched over a pile of papers, “would you give me a hand? I dropped my briefcase and everything spilled.” 

“Sure,” Jaemin responded, flashing her a grin before kneeling, trying to stack the papers as evenly as he could. He glanced at the woman, who wore a business suit, frown lines settled onto her face like they had been there for a long time. “Thank you so much for helping me,” the woman said, sending Jaemin a smile, “I’m quite clumsy.” 

“It’s fine, no trouble,” he replied. “I’m Jaemin,” he introduced when all of his things were packed back up, shaking her hand once. 

“I’m Lee Seoyeon,” the woman said. “I was wondering if you could give me directions? My son changed dorms since the last time I was here and the lady at the reception desk wasn’t exactly helpful.” 

“Uhm, yeah,” Jaemin responded, “what’s his name? I’m pretty new around here but I might know.” 

“Lee Donghyuck,” Seoyeon replied, “I’m here to see my Donghyuckie.” 

***

Jaemin raced through the hallways, sticking his head into each classroom as he ran past, teachers and students alike staring at him, but he paid them no mind. 

“C’mon, c’mon,” he chanted, reaching the end of the hallway, running into the last room. 

The students were all bent over their desks, scribbling on pieces of paper, probably exams. “Excuse me,” the teacher said, standing up to walk over to the panting Jaemin, “what are you doing here? Class is in session.” 

“Mark hyung!” Jaemin cried when he spotted the boy in the back of the room, who immediately looked up at the call of his name. 

“Jaemin-ah, what’re you doing here,” he hissed, setting his pencil down. 

Jaemin gasped for air, not used to running so quickly. “She’s here,” he managed to get out, Mark’s eyes widening considerably before he jumped up, grabbing Jaemin by the elbow and dragging him from the room, the teacher shouting after them. “Hyung, your bag,” Jaemin said, running after Mark. 

“Never mind that,” the older boy replied, “we have to get to Hyuck. Now.” 

Jaemin nodded, legs aching from the exertion he hadn’t felt since dance classes years ago. “I tried to stall her, I said Hyuck was at the tech office, that his computer broke, and she might have a better chance finding him there.” 

Mark grabbed Jaemin’s hand, shooting him a sad smile over his shoulder. “Thanks, Jaemin. I wish you weren’t involved in all of this.” 

“You’re my friends, I’m programmed to help you,” Jaemin replied, squeezing Mark’s hand. “Don’t worry.” 

Mark bit his lip, hiding a grin. “Just, thank you. A lot.” 

The boys came to the turn in the hallway to the dorms, but before they could make the corner Mark stopped, and Jaemin bumped into his back. “Wha-” 

“Shh,” Mark whispered, gnawing on his lip. 

Jaemin frowned but stayed silent, eventually picking up on two voices. 

“Mom? What’re you doing here?” Donghyuck. 

“I messaged you that I was coming, didn’t I?” 

“I just thought you would tell me when,” Donghyuck replied softly, and Jaemin could picture the look of dejection on his face. 

“You should be grateful I stopped by,” Seoyeon said, a sneer in her tone, so different from the way she had addressed Jaemin earlier. 

“I-I am,” Donghyuck said quietly, his words empty. 

“So how are your classes here?” Seoyeon asked, and Jaemin could hear the heel of her shoe tapping against the ground. 

“Good, I’m doing my best,” Donghyuck replied. “One of my teachers really liked my recent essay on-” 

“If your teachers ‘really liked’ something you wrote, why did you get a B in economics?” 

Jaemin could practically feel Mark’s hatred for the woman as the older boy tensed in front of him. 

“I-I, I got As in all my other classes,” Donghyuck responded, hurt evident in his tone. “That subject was just really challenging-” 

“If you’re going to be in this _school_ ,” Mark let out a small growl, “I expect you to learn, Donghyuck. Go to your teacher and ask for extra work, boost your grades.” 

“Yes, Mom, I’ll do that,” Donghyuck replied, words heavy. 

“Now, what about those little friends of yours? Have they caused any more trouble?” 

“N-No,” Donghyuck responded, “they’re all fine.” 

“What about that Chinese one, the one with the bad attitude?” 

“Uhm-” 

“The one who spilt coffee on me, Donghyuck, surely you haven’t forgotten.” 

“Oh, Renjun?” Jaemin hid a smile behind his hand. “He’s good.” 

“And those younger ones? That were holding hands? I hope that type of _friendship_ hasn’t rubbed off on you.” Mark ground his teeth. 

“They’re okay too.” 

“The quiet one, who’s always ignoring what I say. I hope he left already, what was his name again?” 

Jaemin clenched his hands into fists, Mark rubbing his arm to calm him. “Jeno’s still here,” Donghyuck responded. 

Seoyeon hummed, fingers tapping against what Jaemin assumed to be her briefcase. “Come on then, make me some tea at your dorm. It’s the least you can do for me, I did drive two hours to come see you.” 

“Yes, this way,” Donghyuck replied, Mark and Jaemin listening as their footsteps got further and further away. 

Mark sighed, slumping against the wall. “Well, that’s Lee Seoyeon.” 

Jaemin fiddled with his blazer. “Are you okay?” 

“No,” Mark replied, eyes closed. 

“Do you think Hyuck will be okay?” 

“Not right away,” Mark responded. 

Jaemin frowned, but was cut off by his phone buzzing. “Hyuck just sent a message to the chat letting everyone know she’s here,” he mumbled. “What’re you going to do, hyung?” 

Mark shrugged. “Hide out. Wait for her to leave. Hyuck and I have an agreement to stay out of the way of the parents, we don’t want to lose each other again.” 

Jaemin nodded. “Text me, hyung, I’ll bring you anything you need.” 

Mark smiled, ruffling Jaemin’s hair. “Thanks. You should text Jeno and have him with you when you go back to the dorm, knowing Seoyeon she won’t leave without criticizing everyone. It sounds bad, but you might as well get it over with. Just don’t go into the lion’s den alone.” 

“Okay,” Jaemin said, smiling at Mark. “Catch you later?” Mark nodded. “Wait, hyung, did Renjun really spill coffee on Seoyeon?” 

Mark grinned. “Hell yes he did.”


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The long awaited chapter *distant screaming* Omg guys,, I've recieved so many comments that truly make my day!! Since I've been so inactive here's another capter. ILY all!! 
> 
> Note: **CHAPTER CONTAINS DOMESTIC ABUSE AND FOUL LANGUAGE.**
> 
> I love all these boys, mayhaps I cried writing this chapter. AlSo, DONGHYUCK'S back on tour!! UWU I missed my babie <3

“You okay?” 

Jeno huffed. “I should be asking you that.” 

Jaemin sighed, touching the older boy’s cheek. “You look so pale.” 

“Yeah, I’m not looking forward to seeing Seoyeon again is all,” he replied, taking Jaemin’s hand in his own. 

“Don’t worry, I’m right here,” Jaemin said, smiling at the other boy. “If that’s any consolation,” he quickly added. 

Jeno grinned, squeezing his hand. “It is. Thanks, Nana.” 

Jaemin blushed, biting his lip as he freed Jeno’s hand from his grasp. “L-Let’s go, yeah?” 

Jeno reached forward, slotting his key into the door and pushing it open. Immediately Jaemin spotted Donghyuck sitting awkwardly in one of the arm chairs, his mother perched on the couch, a cup of what must be tea clutched in her hands. 

Her gaze flickered up to the two boys, recognition sparking in her eyes when she looked at Jaemin before her gaze hardened when she saw Jeno. 

Donghyuck looked at them with a gaze full of worry and sadness, eyes dropping to his lap soon after. Jaemin had never seen the boy look so small. 

“Oh, Jaemin, was it?” Seoyeon said, looking him up and down. “I didn’t know you were one of Donghyuck’s roommates.” 

“Yeah, I’ve just been here almost a month and a half,” he answered, fidgeting with the sleeve of his blazer. 

Seoyeon hummed, raising the cup to her lips and taking a sip. “And where are the other roommates? Classes?” 

Jaemin glanced at Jeno, trying to gauge the boy’s reaction to being ignored, but his face was impassive. “Yeah,” he heard Donghyuck answer, “but they should be back any time now.” 

The next few minutes passed in silence, Jaemin migrating to sit in the other armchair while Jeno continued to stand. But soon enough the door opened again, Renjun leading the two youngest boys into the dorm. 

Instantly Seoyeon’s lips curled downward into a harsh frown, Renjun’s face void of emotion. “So you’re still here,” Seoyeon scoffed. 

“I wouldn’t want to disappoint you by leaving,” Renjun retorted. “It’s _so_ nice to see you again, Mrs. Lee.” 

Jaemin’s eyes widened at Renjun’s blatant disregard for respect, although as far as he had heard, this woman deserved none. He glanced up at Jeno who noted his confusion, mouthing an, “I’ll tell you later.” 

Seoyeon rolled her eyes before looking behind the boy at Chenle and Jisung. “Ah, you two. I hope you haven’t been continuing down the wrong path.” 

Jisung flinched at her icy glare, eyes downcast, while Chenle inched forward ever so slightly to hide the boy behind him. 

“Don’t talk to them like that,” Donghyuck said, hands shaking slightly. 

Seoyeon instantly turned to him, glaring. “Are you talking back to me?” 

“Don’t talk to them like that,” Donghyuck repeated, quivering. 

“So they _are_ gay,” Seoyeon said, frowning. “What next? All of you? I bet that boy,” she put down her cup to gesture at Jeno, “is.” 

Jaemin stood up, stepping close to Jeno. “Don’t speak to Jeno like that!” 

“Oh my god, we’re just in a room _full_ of faggots, aren’t we!” Seoyeon smiled. She stood up, grabbing Donghyuck’s collar and yanking him up. “I bet you just love this, don’t you, Donghyuck.” 

Donghyuck opened his mouth to speak but she cut him off, palm snapping harshly against his cheek. “I thought I raised you to be different, better than _this_.” Before anyone could stop her she slapped Donghyuck again. “Disgusting, you’re disgusting.” Seoyeon raised her hand again, Jeno tensing beside Jaemin, about to run and pull Donghyuck away, Renjun doing the same across from them. 

Donghyuck cowered, face contorted as he waited for the pain, eyes wet, when a voice spoke up. 

“Let Donghyuck go. _Now_.” 

Mark. 

Seoyeon turned towards the doorway in an instant, grip loosening enough on Donghyuck’s shirt so that he could slip away into Renjun’s awaiting arms. “Lee Minhyung, what the _hell_ are you doing here?” 

Mark’s eyes flashed, looking eerily calm and more serious than Jaemin had ever seen him. Seoyeon walked closer to him, and although she was shorter than Mark, her stance radiated dominance. Yet, Mark didn’t back down. It was as if the air had frozen, and amidst the tense silence Jaemin’s eyes caught on Donghyuck’s face. The boy looked petrified, fear clouding his eyes, but beyond that there was almost something akin to pride and hope. 

“I go to school here,” Mark replied, squaring his shoulders. 

“I thought I made it _abundantly clear_ that I never wanted to see you near my son again,” Seoyeon hissed. “One call to your parents and I’ll have you thrown out of this school.” 

Mark shook his head. “That won’t be necessary, Mrs. Lee. You can threaten me all you like, but you will _never_ hurt Donghyuck or my friends again.” 

Seoyeon snorted. “Yes? And how do you plan to do that? Donghyuck is my son, I’m his legal guardian.” 

“I’ll have statements from all these boys of what you’ve done. You’ve physically harmed Donghyuck multiple times now, and that’s enough to get you and your husband to court, never mind the emotional abuse and neglect. From there Donghyuck can be turned over to the government, where he’ll be in custody until he’s eighteen, and he’ll be far _far_ away from you.” 

Seoyeon’s face darkened before a crazed smirk took over her face. “And what does Donghyuck say to that? Is he willing to go through court hearings just to have me out of his life for a few months?” 

Donghyuck walked forward, legs shaking slightly, the left side of his face reddened. “I want you gone, mother. I never want to see you again. You’ve brought me so much pain, not only to me but to everyone around me!” His hands tightened into fists, tears welling up in his eyes. “You’re supposed to love me, care about my feelings, and what have you ever done? Take that away from me.” Donghyuck glanced at Mark who nodded, and the younger took his hand, lacing their fingers together. “I love Mark, I love my friends, and I _love myself._ You’ll never take that away from me. I was a fool to let you think you had the power to do so. So let _me_ be abundantly clear. You have and _never_ will be my mother, Lee Seoyeon. And you’ll never hurt me or these boys again.”


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **now KISS!**
> 
> this chapter is all over the place, I'm sorry (not really) I'm so happy I can give you guys a longer chapter,, you deserve it!! 
> 
> **CHAPTER CONTAINS MENTIONS OF DOMESTIC ABUSE AND A LOT OF NOMIN FLUFF**
> 
> note: plum blossoms symbolize perseverance, hope, beauty & purity :)

“I can’t believe it,” Donghyuck whispered, slumped against the couch, “she’s gone,” he huffed out a laugh of disbelief. “She’s really gone?” 

Mark nodded, rubbing one of Donghyuck’s arms. “She is. I’m so, so proud of you, Hyuck.” 

Right after Donghyuck’s outburst, Eunji had shown up to install the new microwave, and was quickly informed by Jaemin what had happened, and Seoyeon had been escorted off school property by security. The principal had come down, telling Donghyuck that he would be safe to stay at the school until his parents were brought to court, and that one of the points they would make during the trial would be to have Donghyuck continue to stay and receive treatment. 

Donghyuck bit his lip, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “I-I just, oh my god!” 

Mark laughed, pulling the younger boy into a hug. “This is so wholesome,” Renjun cried, making the boys chuckle, “I can’t watch. I’m making popcorn with our _new microwave_ , thanks Chenle.” 

Chenle shrugged. “No problem, hyung.” 

Renjun rolled his eyes before turning to look at Donghyuck. “I’m really happy for you, Hyuck. Congratulations on being free.” 

Donghyuck let out a watery giggle, smiling up at the boy. “Thanks, Injun. Thank you all, you guys make me strong.” 

“Jisung’s crying.” 

“Chenle’s crying too. That’s what happens when you throw people under the bus, hyung,” Jisung retorted, rubbing his eyes. 

***

“I feel electrified. Is that just me?” 

Jeno laughed, letting Jaemin back hug him as they walked through one of the big greenhouses, the one styled with a Chinese influence, the sky outside beginning to darken. “Maybe. But yeah, after earlier, I do feel buzzed.” 

“I just have so many questions, but I can’t form them all,” Jaemin sighed, shuffling close behind Jeno, his hands in the older boy’s hoodie pocket as they walked through the indoor garden. “And I’m so happy for Hyuck, I feel like my face is gonna fall off from smiling.” 

Jeno hummed, pulling Jaemin to a bench and pushing him to sit down. “Ask away, maybe I have answers.” 

“Well, first off, how did Renjun get away with sassing Seoyeon?” Jaemin asked, confused. 

Jeno kicked at the gravel floor. “One of Renjun’s older cousins is on the board here, so technically Jun can do anything he would like, he just prefers not to be treated differently.” 

“Oh, I wonder why he didn’t tell me,” Jaemin wondered, eyes wide. 

Jeno shrugged. “He’s just never liked talking about it. He and his family have different views. They get along, Renjun just doesn’t like spending that much time with them.” 

Jaemin nodded, looking down at his hands. “The other thing I was wondering about was how did Mark hyung know to come to the dorm right at the moment he did? Wasn’t he hiding out or something?” 

“I honestly have no idea,” Jeno replied, “sometimes it just seems like Hyuck and Mark hyung are telepathic.” 

“I think you’re spot on with the soulmate theory,” Jaemin smiled. “It certainly seems like a real possibility with them.” 

Jeno grinned. “Yeah. It does.” 

Jaemin tilted his head, staring up at the boy in front of him. The sun had set, the lanterns hanging from the ceiling let out a soft red glow. Jeno reached for a low hanging tree branch that swept near the ground next to them, carefully picking a flower. He knelt in front of Jaemin, smiling when the younger boy trailed his fingers gently over the small petals. 

“Plum blossom?” Jaemin asked, voice quiet. 

Jeno hummed in confirmation, lifting his hand to tuck the flower behind Jaemin’s ear, the tips of his fingers trailing down along the side of the boy’s face. 

Jaemin looked at Jeno, faces so close, eyes widened. 

“Jeno-” 

“Jaemin-” 

Jeno huffed out a soft laugh, letting his fingers curve naturally around Jaemin’s cheek, the warmth from his palm seeping into the younger boy’s skin. 

Jaemin stared at the boy in front of him, the boy who had so easily become the most precious thing to him in such a sort time. He slid a hand onto Jeno’s shoulder, close to his neck, fingers twisted in the fabric of his hoodie right above the dip of his collarbone. “You’re beautiful,” Jaemin breathed. 

Jeno blushed, pink dancing along his cheeks as he looked away in embarrassment, eyelashes casting shadows on his skin from the dulled light. “Jaemin, I,” he sucked in a breath. “You mean so much to me-” he cut himself off, glancing up. 

“I know, it’s the same for me,” Jaemin whispered. 

A tiny smile made its way onto Jeno’s lips. “You’re always in my head, I can’t ever stop thinking about you,” he rushed out, “you make me better, you- you make me feel loved.” 

Jaemin felt short of breath, just managing to give the boy a wobbly grin, emotions thick in the small space between them. “Jeno, can I kiss you?” 

The boy shakily nodded, hand guiding Jaemin’s face down, eyes searching Jaemin’s as if he was still seeking permission, until their lips finally met. 

The kiss was shy and tentative, their noses bumping until Jaemin tilted his head, slotting their lips together at a more comfortable angle. Jeno’s hand found Jaemin’s waist, fingers catching in the fabric of his grey knit sweater. 

“Jen,” Jaemin breathed, cheeks flushed as he pulled away, “Jeno-” 

The boy stood up, slipping onto the bench beside Jaemin, where the younger instantly turned to him, cupping his face with warm hands and pressing light kisses to his lips. Jeno smiled, resting their foreheads together as he laced his arms around Jaemin’s waist. “Hi,” he whispered into the air between them, causing Jaemin to huff. 

“Hi, you nerd,” he replied, face flushing nonetheless. 

Jeno giggled, hiding his face in the crook of Jaemin’s neck, arms tightening around the younger. Jaemin rolled his eyes, a silly grin taking over his face as he threaded his arms around Jeno’s neck. 

“You smell like coffee,” Jeno whispered, “coffee and citrus- the citrus is your shampoo, isn’t it?” 

Jaemin hummed in agreement. “You smell like chocolate.” 

“That’s because Mark hyung squirted me with chocolate sauce earlier,” Jeno explained, face still hidden, “he couldn’t get the lid off, and it ended up bursting. The smell didn’t come off even after I showered.” 

“I would have liked to have seen the explosion,” Jaemin laughed. 

Jeno made an indignant noise, Jaemin chuckling and threading one of his hands through Jeno’s fluffy hair. “You know, it’s almost curfew.” 

Jeno sighed, and Jaemin could picture his pout. “I know. We should probably go back inside. I don’t want to ruin this by having you wind up with a detention.” 

Jaemin drew away, smiling at Jeno before pecking his cheek. “C’mon, let’s head back.” 

Jeno reached up before Jaemin could move, fixing the flower in his hair that had come loose. “Beautiful.” 

Jaemin blushed, standing up and dragging a smug Jeno to his feet, intertwining their fingers. “Shut up.” 

***

Jaemin glanced across the room at Jeno’s bed, the older boy fast asleep, curled up into a ball with the light from the annoyingly bright alarm clock on his table (they had tried many times to change the brightness setting, but it had never worked) casting dark shadows across his face. He smiled when the boy shifted, cuddling closer into his pillow. 

Jaemin was unable to sleep, the tirade of emotions throughout the day keeping his mind alive. Sighing, he slid out from under his covers, tugging on a sweatshirt over his pajamas- Jeno’s, he thought, due to the fact that it was a little large on him- and crept to the door, quietly letting himself out of the room. 

The living area was dark, save for the moonlight filtering in through the windows. Jaemin shuffled to the sink, pouring himself a glass of tap water. He closed his eyes, leaning back against the counter as he drank, the sharp edge digging into the small of his back. 

He set the glass down in the sink basin, trudging to the only room with light shining from underneath the door jam. Gently tapping on the wood, he almost instantly heard a “come in.” 

“Hey,” Jaemin greeted Renjun, squinting slightly at the bright light from the desk lamp. 

Renjun looked up from a worksheet he was scribbling on, smiling at the younger boy. “Hey yourself. Sit?” Jaemin nodded, sinking down onto Renjun’s bed, the older boy turning on his lava lamp before flicking off the other light. “What’s up?” he asked, folding his legs underneath him as he spun his chair to face the bed. 

Jaemin shrugged. “I guess I’m just coming down from all the crazy emotions that went around today? So much happened.” 

Renjun hummed, picking up a rubix cube from where it had been resting near a stack of notebooks. “Yeah, with Hyuck’s mom’s drama paired with you and Jeno getting together, I’m sure you’re processing a lot.” 

“Yeah,” Jaemin trailed off, “wait, how do you know about Jeno and I?” 

“First, you were holding hands,” Jaemin rolled his eyes, “second, you were smiling like you had just won the lottery.” 

Jaemin blushed, looking down. “Really? Embarrassing.” 

Renjun shook his head. “No. I’ve never seen you look so happy, Jaemin. I’m glad you and Jeno are together, you’re really good for each other.” 

“Thanks, Injun,” Jaemin replied, flashing him a smile. 

“I didn’t know we were meeting up.” 

Both boys glanced towards the door where a sleepy looking Donghyuck stood, pajamas wrinkled and hiding a yawn behind his hand. Renjun rolled his eyes at the boy while Jaemin giggled, patting the spot on the bed beside him. 

Donghyuck dramatically flopped onto the bed, partially laying on top of Jaemin. “What were you guys talking about? Oh, I hope it was about Jeno and Jaemin’s relationship, I want all the details.” 

“You know too?” Jaemin huffed. 

Donghyuck giggled. “Oh, honey, I know what it looks like to have just made out with a boy. You didn’t do a great job hiding that small fact.” Jaemin blushed as Renjun laughed. “So? Is Jen a good kisser?” 

“Oh my god,” Jaemin whined, covering his face with his hands. 

“Answer,” Donghyuck fake cried, Renjun nodding along. 

“Yes, he is,” Jaemin rushed out, immediately falling onto the pillows and hiding his burning cheeks. 

Donghyuck laughed, laying down alongside the younger boy, becoming the small spoon. “Injun, you coming?” 

Renjun sighed but climbed onto the bed, cuddling Donghyuck from the front. The bed was small, and even smaller with three boys laying on it, but the closeness was comforting for Jaemin. 

“You guys give good cuddles. Second only to Mark,” Donghyuck said decidedly, the side of his face illuminated by the lava lamp. “I swear he was a koala in a previous life, it took me ten minutes to escape his bed earlier.” 

“Cute,” Jaemin yawned. 

“Mhm,” Renjun hummed, staring up at the ceiling. 

“Yeah, I love him,” Donghyuck sighed. “Love you guys too.” 

“Same here,” Jaemin murmured, eyes closing. 

Renjun laughed quietly. “Go to sleep, you two idiots.” 

***

“Hey, hyung.” 

Jaemin looked up from his phone where he had been playing Animal Crossing. “Oh, hey, Sungie. I thought you had classes?” 

Jisung shifted on the couch next to Jaemin, pulling a pillow to his chest. “No, starts later.” 

“Okay, wanna watch a movie-” 

“Hyung, I wanted to talk to you.” 

Jaemin’s eyes widened. “Yeah, of course, what’s on your mind?” 

Jisung played with the edge of the pillow nervously. “Well, with Donghyuck hyung standing up to his mother and everything, I wanted to tell you about me. If that’s okay. I just thought it would be a good time, since everyone’s past is sorta coming to the surface right now?” 

“Yeah, yeah sure,” Jaemin responded, smiling at the boy. “Tell me whatever you’re comfortable with sharing.” 

Jisung nodded, taking a deep breath. “Uhm, well, with Donghyuck hyung, he’s gonna be something like a foster kid now,” Jaemin nodded, biting his lip, “like me.” 

“You’re in foster care?” Jaemin asked gently. 

Jisung nodded. “Yeah. My family is nice, but I never clicked with them. So I guess it’s good on multiple levels that I’m at this school.” He took a breath. “Basically, before I was put into the system I didn’t have a good home life, like really didn’t have a good life.” He looked up at Jaemin who made a small noise of understanding. “My parents were alcoholics, and my father abused me.” Jaemin blanched, opening his mouth to comfort the boy, but Jisung continued on. “But then they died. We were driving to a mini mart to buy more beer,” he frowned, “and a truck hit the car. I wound up in the hospital, but they both died. In front of me.” 

“Jisung-” 

“But it’s okay,” the youngest boy said, even as he shook and tears welled up in his eyes, “I-I’m here now, and I’m with all of you hyungs, and I’m getting better.” 

Jaemin smiled sadly at him, feeling his own tears come on. He placed his hand next to Jisung’s on the couch cushion, heart warming when Jisung touched their fingertips together. “Thank you for telling me, Jisung. It means a lot.” 

Jisung nodded, staring at his lap. 

“Wanna watch a movie?” Jaemin asked, grinning when the younger gave him a shaky smile and a nod.


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mark has a secret? That he's kept from Donghyuck?! o.O 
> 
> the last section of this chapter is from Hyuckie's view :) i love markhyuck, i needed to add some SorRy <3 
> 
> Anyhow, I need prompts and suggestions for future works,, so come yell at me on my tumblr account (throwback to the good old days rip) [tumblr](https://wasatch-97.tumblr.com/) :)

“Question.” 

“I quite possibly have an answer.” 

Jaemin smiled, bumping shoulders with Jeno. Their feet were dangling over the side of the bridge, pants rolled up to their knees, toes touching the water of the small pond under them. They had found their way back to the greenhouse, now _their_ greenhouse, the large garden almost always empty, leaving them free to talk (and kiss). 

“I know about Hyuck, Mark hyung, and Sungie’s parents,” Jaemin murmured, tilting his face up to look at Jeno, “what about you? What’re your parents like?” 

Jeno smiled, gaze dropping to his lap where their hands were resting, fingers intertwined. “They’re both good people. Kind and hardworking. My dad’s an accountant and my mom’s a grade school teacher.” 

“They sound nice,” Jaemin smiled. “Do they visit you here?” 

Jeno’s face fell slightly. “No, my dad would but he’s always busy, and my mom-” he sighed, “she blames herself that I’m like this, that I have anxiety.” 

“Jeno,” Jaemin murmured, squeezing the boy’s hand. 

“She just sounds _so sad_ whenever I call her or visit, so I just stopped.” Jeno looked up at Jaemin, his gaze full of hurt. “Jaemin, I told her not to come see me while I’m here.” 

“Jen, maybe it’s a good thing,” Jaemin said, rubbing a thumb over the boy’s knuckles. “If she keeps blaming herself, it’s not doing anything positive for you. This time away might do you both some good.” 

Jeno nodded, leaning his head against Jaemin’s shoulder. “Yeah. I just really miss her. Both of them.” 

Jaemin buried his nose in Jeno’s soft hair, the scent of chamomile and honey lulling him into daze. “I know. But you’ll see them again.” 

Jeno sighed, mindlessly playing with the ring on Jaemin’s pointer finger. “Did I tell you I have cats?” 

Jaemin chuckled. “No, but you seem like a cat person.” 

“I have three,” Jeno murmured, “they were the only things that could get me out of an anxiety attack besides time. I hated having to leave them back at home when I came here.” 

“I’m sorry,” Jaemin replied, tilting his head to lean against Jeno’s. “What are their names?” 

“Bongshik, Seol, and Lal,” Jeno answered, and Jaemin could hear a smile in his voice. 

“I’m sure they’re cute, just like you,” Jaemin hummed, ignoring Jeno’s harsh squeeze of his hand in retaliation. 

Jeno’s phone buzzed, making the boy sit up straight with a groan. “It’s my alarm, I have to go to class,” he huffed. 

“Go,” Jaemin replied, kissing his nose. “And I’ll see you tonight for dinner with the boys?” 

“Wouldn’t miss it,” Jeno laughed, standing up and pulling Jaemin up with him. “Kiss me goodbye?” 

Jaemin snorted but cupped Jeno’s face anyhow, pressing their lips together. Jeno smiled into the kiss, hands finding Jaemin’s waist, squeezing softly. The alarm sounded again and Jaemin huffed. “You’re gonna be late.” 

“I don’t wanna go,” Jeno whined against Jaemin’s neck, nosing at his skin. 

Jaemin rolled his eyes, smiling. “Silly. Go, I don’t want you to get in trouble.” 

Jeno sighed, pulling away. “Fine, fine. See you later,” he said, squeezing Jaemin’s hands before running off. 

***

“I wish the sun would combust and all life on earth would perish.” 

Jaemin glanced up from his homework at Chenle, who was sitting across the table. “That was rather dark- isn’t that Injun’s specialty?” 

Jaemin could practically hear Renjun’s eyes roll, while Jeno chuckled, scribbling away in some notebook with his hand resting on Jaemin’s knee. 

“What math problem are you stuck on this time,” the older Chinese boy asked, peering at Chenle’s notebook. 

“Bold of you to assume it’s a math question,” the green-haired boy muttered. 

All the boys- excluding Mark and Donghyuck- were at the dining room table studying together. It was a rare time when none of their schedules overlapped for a whole evening, and as Donghyuck had claimed, right before Mark had dragged him into their room, bouncing ideas and questions off of each other while they worked might help them learn faster. 

“I don’t get why Mark hyung and Donghyuck hyung don’t have to study with us,” Jisung sighed, pouting at the couple’s door. 

“Hyuck said they are gonna join us,” Jeno supplied, “but apparently Mark hyung had to talk to him about something.” 

_“How could you not tell me?!”_

The boys’ heads shot up at the loud cry, looking at Mark and Donghyuck’s closed door. “Wha-” Chenle started, but was cut off by another shout. 

_“Donghyuck- hear me out!”_

Mark never raised his voice. 

Even during the faceoff with Seoyeon, he was eerily calm and even-toned. 

_“You didn’t think to tell me? Me? Mark, don’t you trust me, us, our relationship?”_

Jaemin stared wide-eyed at Jeno who bit his lip, face showing concern. 

_“Donghyuck, you know I do- just listen to me-”_

_“I- I’m going out. Don’t wait up.”_

The door opened and Donghyuck scurried out, teary-eyed and shaking. No one made a move to stop the boy as he left the dorm. 

“Hyung?” Jisung asked quietly, alerting the others to Mark’s presence in his bedroom doorway. Mark leaned against the frame, covering his face with his hands, a heavy sigh leaving his lips. “A-Are you and Donghyuck hyung okay?” 

Mark walked over to the refrigerator, opening and grabbing a bottle of water and taking a sip, slamming the door shut just a bit too harshly, the noise making Jisung jump. “We just had a little argument, don’t worry, Sungie.” 

“Mark, are you going to go after him?” Jeno asked. 

Mark nodded, putting down his water and flashing a small- yet tight- smile at his best friend. “Yeah. Always.” 

“What do you think that was all about?” Chenle asked once the oldest boy had left the dorm. “Hyuck hyung and Mark hyung never fight.” 

“I don’t know,” Renjun sighed, tapping his pencil against the table. “I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.” 

***

Donghyuck sat on the ground, leaning back against the outside of one of the buildings, rough masonry digging into his back, with his knees drawn up to his chest and his head buried in his arms. He knew he had screwed up- he should be happy for Mark, and he was, but his stomach was churning with nerves and worry and sadness and so many other emotions he couldn’t sort out from one another. 

“Hyuck?” 

Donghyuck looked up slowly, meeting Mark’s gaze. “Hyung?” 

Mark sighed, sitting down beside the younger. “Hyuck, I’m sorry. I don’t have a choice, I have to leave this school. The doctors cleared me, and now there’s no legal medical reason for me to be here.” 

“I know,” Donghyuck mumbled, “I’m happy, this means you’re better,” he glanced at Mark, who nodded. “You've been getting so much better, I'm so proud of you, I-“ his voice wobbled, “I’m just so selfish, I want you to stay-” 

“Hyuck,” Mark murmured, pulling the boy into a hug, Donghyuck’s body shaking with quiet sobs. “Hyuckie-ah, love, look at me.” 

Donghyuck raised his head, Mark reaching up to wipe away the tears running down the boy’s cheeks. “Losing your parents-” Donghyuck opened his mouth to retort but Mark gently shushed him. “I know you, Hyuck, and I know that in the past years they’ve been nothing but horrifically cruel to you, but they’re your parents, and you had a good early childhood with them. It’s okay to miss that.” 

Donghyuck nodded, fingers catching the hem of Mark’s sweatshirt. 

“Losing that, paired with going into the foster care system, I know it’s so much. But you’re strong and brave,” he pressed a kiss to Donghyuck’s temple, “I know you’ll do well.” 

“I just- without you,” Donghyuck bit his lip, blinking away more tears that were threatening to fall. “Without you, I’m _not me_ -” he hiccuped, the new tears rolling down his cheeks. 

“You never let me finish what I was saying earlier,” Mark said, lifting Donghyuck’s chin and running a thumb along the boy’s tan skin, catching the tears as they fell. “I applied to a university for early acceptance and got in.” Mark tapped his pointer finger against the younger’s chin. “The campus is twenty-three minutes away from here. I timed it before I even applied.” Donghyuck opened his mouth in shock, but Mark continued on. “We’ve made promises to each other before, never to leave the other behind, and I will always keep those promises.” 

Donghyuck let out a watery laugh, eyes crinkling into crescents, slinging his arms around Mark’s neck and climbing onto his lap. “I should have never doubted us, I’m a fool.” 

Mark shook his head, smiling. “No, I understand. Just listen to everything I have to say before running off, okay?” 

“Promise to tell me next time before you go applying to schools? I knew you were looking, but you never said anything serious about it,” Donghyuck murmured, hand curling around Mark’s nape. 

“Never again,” Mark chuckled. “Don’t worry.” 

Donghyuck giggled, rubbing their noses together. “I love you so much- I can’t even say-” 

Mark grinned, kissing Donghyuck carefully, sweetly. “I love you too. I’ll never leave you, Hyuck, you’re my everything.”


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Welp this snuck up on me!! The final chapter (aside from the epilogue) :"( I'm sad to see the boys' story end but don't worry! The epilogue will continue nomin's story, and I'm planning a side story about Mark and Hyuck. So stay tuned <3 
> 
> Altered lyrics from Dear Dream and We Go Up by NCT Dream are used in this chapter :) I'm too cheesy, sorry haha

Jaemin stared down at the journal one of the therapists had urged him to start using. Opening the grey colored book he flipped through the pages, glancing over countless entries about his everyday life at the school- some entries written in pen distorted by the soapy dish water Chenle had splashed everywhere during a fight over the last lollipop in the boys’ candy bowl. 

There were scraps of paper taped in that Donghyuck, Jaemin, and Renjun had passed between them in their one class together- literature- the teacher was as dry as dirt, that was the only reason Renjun condoned the passing of notes. 

Polaroids, polaroids of the boys making silly faces, throwing things at each other, and laughing, all the pictures a little bit blurry, but the expressions of happiness still beyond evident. Jaemin smiled at a picture of all seven of them, Jeno’s arm outstretched as to try and fit them all in the shot, yet half of Mark’s face was cut out. Still, it was one of Jaemin’s favorite pictures, sunny smiles reaching their eyes as they all hugged each other in a mess of arms. 

And finally, towards the last pages of the book there was the plum blossom that had brought Jaemin and Jeno together, pressed so that it wouldn’t ever die. Jaemin bit his lip, running a fingertip over the side of the photo next to it- a picture taken with his phone, Jeno holding the younger close to him and pressing a kiss to his cheek, Jaemin’s face caught mid giggle. Jaemin blinked back tears that were threatening to fall, lips pressed into a thin line. 

Closing the notebook and shoving it under his pillow, Jaemin stood up. He needed to talk to Jeno, one way or another. 

***

“It’s going to be so different without you,” Chenle sighed, poking Mark’s shoulder as he walked past the dining room table where the boys were sitting, dumping his plate unceremoniously in the sink. 

“It’s going to be weird not being here,” Mark replied, hand rubbing Donghyuck’s shoulder softly as the younger leaned against him. “But don’t worry, I’ll be back here often enough.” 

“It feels like an era’s coming to an end,” Renjun added, fiddling with his fork, glaring at his mashed potatoes. Jeno hummed in agreement, cheek pressed against Jaemin’s shoulder. The younger bit his lip, staring at his hardly touched meal in front of him. 

“Can we- can we go,” Jisung bit his lip, unsure of what to say. 

“I was thinking the same thing,” Donghyuck replied, smiling at the youngest. “Let’s go.” 

***

“What are we doing,” Jaemin hissed, following the boys as they creeped out of the building into the dark night. “It’s past curfew!” 

“You’ll see,” Renjun replied, face hidden in the shadows. 

Mark and Donghyuck led the boys into the gardens, tiptoeing as quietly as they could over the gravel, going further and further away from the buildings. Eventually they stopped, in what appeared to be a small clearing hidden by trees. Jeno grabbed Jaemin’s hand, leading him to sit down on a wooden bench, two stumps with a board nailed across it. There was the sound of a match being lit, and then there was a small glow, just enough light for Jaemin to see that they were sitting around a campfire, several more benches facing the firepit. Donghyuck sat on one, obviously waiting for Mark, who was building up the fire, while Renjun was sitting next to Chenle and Jisung on the third bench. 

“This is something we haven’t done in quite a while,” Mark said, addressing Jaemin. He moved to sit down next to Donghyuck who cuddled into his chest. 

“It’s special to us,” Chenle continued, “being here, with the fire, with our family.” 

“Do you remember what I told you the day you arrived here?” Donghyuck asked Jaemin, voice soft. 

“Yeah, I asked if you all were close and you said you’re all family,” Jaemin answered. 

“It’s true,” Jeno carried on, “we’re a family.” 

“And you’re part of us now,” Renjun said, smiling at Jaemin. 

“We’ll always be here for each other, as long as we’re on this earth,” Jisung murmured. 

“Leaving was inevitable- it’s a fact of life,” Mark sighed, “but I know that if I’m ever lost-” 

“You’ll come back to us,” Donghyuck smiled. “In one way or another.” 

“‘Cause we’re your home,” Jeno nodded. 

“It’s not the end,” Chenle murmured, leaning his head onto Renjun’s shoulder, clasping Jisung’s hand. “It won’t ever be.” 

They drifted off into silence, staring at the flickering fire. Jaemin closed his eyes, the burning sensation behind his eyes strong. 

“Are you all ready?” Donghyuck asked, and Jaemin opened his eyes in time to see the boys nod. Renjun stood, passing around scraps of paper and golf pencils. 

“Write worries or fears down,” Chenle explained to the older boy. “We go around the circle and toss them into the fire. You can say what you wrote or just stay silent, it’s okay either way.” 

Jaemin nodded and they all got to writing, some boys scribbling down words right away while others tapped their pencils in thought. 

“I’m ready,” Donghyuck said after a few minutes, glancing around the circle before he stood up. He walked the few feet to the fire, staring down into the yellow and orange flames. “I’m scared- scared of so many things. Scared of seeing my parents again, going into the foster system, my mental health, losing Mark to the all great and powerful thing called uni, but most of all, growing old. Losing moments like these.” He tossed the paper into the fire, watching as the words dissolved into ash. Sitting back down, he curled into Mark’s arms, the couple exchanging quiet smiles. 

Renjun stood up next, walking forward. “I’m afraid of my future,” he sighed, “it’s so easy when all I think about is the current moment, but honestly, I need to figure out where I want to go, who I want to be. And that’s terrifying.” Dropping the paper into the flames he bit his lip before turning away. 

Jisung walked up next, crouching down to place his paper into the fire, staring hard until it had disappeared into the heat. 

Jeno squeezed Jaemin’s hand before standing. “I’m scared that I’ve missed too much. Like I’ve never had a normal high school experience, and sometimes I wish that I could have- could. But I wouldn’t change what I have now.” He glanced back at Jaemin, eyes warm. “Just- I’m worried I’ve missed out.” 

Chenle walked out, and like Jisung he dropped his paper quietly into the flames, eyes glazed. 

“I’m scared,” Mark sighed, “I’m scared of going out into the world. Everything’s approaching so quickly, and I know I’ll always have you all, but I don’t know how to cope in a world outside of the walls of this school. I’m scared to leave you all, the best things that have ever happened to me.” 

When it was Jaemin’s turn he stood up on shaky legs, pulling his hand from Jeno’s and walking towards the flames. He stared at his feet and the dirt underneath them, biting his lip. “I- I’m scared of losing what I’ve found here. I’ve n-never felt more loved, not even when my father was alive,” he closed his eyes. “I’m terrified of telling you all I was cleared and that I’m leaving.” 

Dropping the paper into the fire, he tried to ignore the intakes of breath from around the circle, trudging back to his bench with Jeno, head bowed. 

When he sat back down, he didn’t know what to expect, but Jeno just simply wrapped an arm around him, pressing them closely together. Jaemin hid his face in the older’s neck, body shaking as he cried silently, Jeno’s heartbeats fluttering quickly against the younger’s hand splayed across his chest. 

“I’m not a-always, but with you all I can be fearless,” Chenle whispered, voice shaking. “I love you all more than you can know.” 

“I love you guys too,” Donghyuck whispered. Jaemin couldn’t see their faces, his own buried in Jeno’s shirt, but could picture the sadness in the boys’ eyes. 

Jeno suddenly stood, taking Jaemin’s hand and pulling him up. He then dragged the two youngest to their feet, Mark, Donghyuck, and Renjun soon following. “This can’t be sad,” he said, “we’re going to be happy. Happy for Mark hyung and Jaemin who get to start new lives. Though I can’t be the only one to hope we’ll always be together,” he glanced at his best friend and boyfriend who both nodded. “So, say something happy- something that makes you smile, something that you love, anything that brings you joy. I’ll go first.” He grabbed Jisung and Jaemin’s hands, the boys closest to him. “I love each of you, all of your quirks, what makes you you. I love Mark hyung for his terrible sense of humor, Chenle for his crazy water balloon fights inside, Jisungie for the comfort he brings people without even trying, Injun for his sensibility and weirdness, Hyuck for his habit of bringing everyone jawbreakers on down days, and Jaems for his weird obsession with soap asmr videos. But I love you all for your compassion and endless kindness towards others, the way you always but others first, and how you cherish every moment with one another.” 

“Fucking Jeno,” Renjun hissed, wiping his tears away. “Who knew you were such a big sap.” Jeno just chuckled, shooting him a watery grin. 

“To keep with a theme, I can’t be more thankful for you all, always making me smile,” Mark said, grabbing Donghyuck and Chenle’s hands. 

“I love you all for the strength you give me,” Donghyuck continued, squeezing Mark and Jaemin’s hands. 

“I love how you guys always take care of one another,” Jaemin said. 

“I love how you all know how to pull a prank,” Chenle added, giggling. “But also how to make someone’s day.” 

“I love you guys for taking the time to know me, each other, and everyone around you so you can treat them with the kindness they deserve,” Jisung said, Chenle bumping shoulders with him. 

“And I love you all for being passionate about love,” Renjun ended. 

It was Donghyuck who started laughing first, his high pitched giggles resonating in the air. Soon they were all joining in, voices mixed as they hugged each other tightly, the fire down to embers, glowing in the background, stars twinkling above them. 

“So,” Renjun sighed, staring at the sky. “This is it.” 

Jaemin’s giggles quieted. “Yeah, it’s the end. To this chapter, but never to the rest.” 

Jisung smiled at him. “Never goodbye.” 

“Let’s promise to always keep going forward and not look at our past as losses,” Donghyuck said, resting his head on Mark’s shoulder, both of them looking towards the stars. 

“Let’s make a promise to always keep moving forward. We’ll keep going up.” 

Chenle pretended to raise a glass to the sky. “To us, the dreamies.” 

Jeno smiled down at Jaemin, kissing him softly before shouting along with the rest of the boys. “To the dreamies!”


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Coming Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaah so we've reached the end!! Here's an extra long nomin fluff ending because I feel terrible for making you all wait so long for the epilogue <3 I feel terrible for putting them in a long distance relationship (I understand how hard they are) :( 
> 
> Ohmygosh I can never thank you guys enough for all the support you've given me while I've been writing Together (We Can Dream). This was an interesting story to write and maybe some day I'll do some severe editing and flush it out, but I'm glad I published it when I did. 
> 
> I was nervous to post my second full story on AO3, if you guys are subscribed, I mostly write one shots because I can get them out in one day. I always find it more challenging with a story because of updates and keeping the characters consistent. I hope I did okay with these guys. 
> 
> Anyways, I hope you enjoy the final chapter! I will be publishing a side story about Markhyuck's journey later on (Idk when, but lets hope that it's soon haha). My tumblr link is in my bio if ya want to come shout at me :) and that's about it! 
> 
> To the Dreamies!

“What do you think?” Jaemin spun around, showing off the newest addition to his wardrobe. 

Jeno hummed from the other side of the computer screen, tilting his head cutely. _“I think the shirt looks good on you, Nana.”_

Jaemin smiled, flopping down on his bed, his face taking up the image reflected back at him in the upper corner of the screen. Jeno stared back at him from the other end of the video call, also on his bed, laptop balanced on his knees. 

“So how’s everyone?” Jaemin asked, resting his cheek on the palm of his hand. 

_“Okay,”_ Jeno replied, _“Renjun’s doing really well. He’s actually slept a few days in a row, not that long, but he’s slept.”_ Jaemin grinned, nodding happily. _“Jisung and Chenle are good as well, and Hyuck’s been bouncing off the walls ever since you said you’re coming to visit. Mark’s been here a lot too, he’s stressed, but working hard.”_

“And what about you?” Jaemin asked, grinning shyly at the boy. “How’re you doing?” 

Jeno sighed. _“Okay. School’s tough, therapy’s tough, and I’m missing you like crazy. But you’re visiting soon, I’ve been crossing off the days,”_ he grabbed a small calendar off his table, showing it to Jaemin who laughed, heart aching nonetheless. 

“I miss you too,” Jaemin whispered. “So much.” 

_“Mm.”_ Jeno smiled sadly. 

Jaemin reached forward, gently trailing his fingers along the side of Jeno’s pixelated face, the screen cold under his fingers. “You’re so beautiful.” 

Jeno let his hand rest against the corner of the screen, Jaemin matching their fingers together, hands virtually pressed up against one another. Jeno’s eyes were warm and dark, lips red from being bitten under stress. His hair had been dyed a darker brown, fringe pushed to the side, exposing his forehead. Jaemin’s lips parted, a jumble of words he wanted to say aching to get out. “Jeno- I-” he closed his eyes, tilting his head down. Not yet. “I- I miss you.” 

_“I miss you too, Jaemin.”_

***

Jaemin leaned his head against the train window, watching as buildings flashed by. His duffle bag was at his feet, and he tried to ignore the loud noises coming from the other passengers as he sat in the far back, mind buzzing. 

His phone rang and he checked the caller id, smiling. “Hyuck?” 

_“Jaeminie!”_ Came the excited reply from the other line. _“Are you on your way?”_

“Mhm,” Jaemin said, “got on the train an hour ago. Should arrive in another one to two, depending on the weather. If it looks like it’s gonna rain that can slow it down.” 

Donghyuck sighed. _“Well, we’re missing you, you better hurry up! Mark got here last night.”_

In the background a voice, distinctly Mark’s, shouted a greeting. 

“Tell him hi, and don’t worry, I’ll be there quickly,” Jaemin responded. 

_“Okay,”_ Donghyuck agreed. _“Hurry back, Jeno’s gonna wear holes in the floor with all the pacing he’s doing.”_

Jaemin laughed and an indignant _“hey!”_ was heard. 

_“He’s gonna take the phone- Jaemin! It was nice knowing you-”_

Jaemin giggled at Donghyuck’s antics, but breath caught in his throat, just like always, when he heard the other voice. 

_“Hi,”_ Jeno greeted, voice pitched slightly higher, probably from nervousness. 

“Hey, Jen,” Jaemin said, unconsciously smiling. “I’m excited to see you.” 

_“Yeah, me too- so much,”_ Jeno rushed. _“Just get here safe and the boys and I will see you at the front gate.”_

“Mhm, I’ll text you when I get on the bus.” 

Jeno sighed. _“I’m really looking forward to seeing you again. Last time I saw you was for a long weekend in March- it’s early June.”_

“Me too,” Jaemin murmured. “Just a few more hours, yeah?” 

_“Yeah.”_

***

Jaemin groaned as he stepped off the bus, raising his arms above his head to stretch. Two hours on the train paired with an hour more on the bus took a toll on his back. 

He picked up his duffle bag, slinging it over his shoulder, and began to walk down the sidewalk. 

As Jaemin grew closer to his destination he began to see things that sparked memories. The large trees shading the rather quiet street, sunlight still flickering past the leaves, shadows dancing in lazy patterns on the sidewalk. 

And there was the old corner store- sign hanging lopsided above the door, a lamp flickering on and off even during the warm afternoon. Jaemin smiled as he remembered the times he had been in the mart. 

_“C’mon, Jaems, you’re being slow!”_

_“Sorry, Hyuck,” Jaemin replied, “how much time do we have left?”_

_Donghyuck pulled open his phone as they stood together in one of the two dingy aisles of the store, Jisung in the back corner in the candy section, awarded with the job of candy supplier for the week. “Fourteen minutes before we need to be back at school,” Donghyuk answered, “Sungie, you better hurry up!”_

_Jisung rolled his eyes while the old woman tending the cash register hissed at the eldest for the noise they were making. Jaemin just groaned, turning around to grab a package of crackers- the only somewhat healthy looking thing in the establishment._

_“Let’s go,” Donghyuck said after a moment, hands filled with capri suns, Jisung trailing after him to the register. They passed a few other students, nodding their heads at each other on the way by. The old woman gave Donghyuck the stink-eye as she scanned their items, the boy just shooting Jaemin a sly grin before Jisung jabbed him in the stomach with his sharp elbow in retaliation._

Jaemin sighed, kicking at the ground. Looking up, he could see the school buildings, all brick and fierce looking, set back a ways from the road. His heart burned, the feeling of coming back to a home that was no longer his strong. 

He reached a point in the sidewalk where he could finally see the big entrance gates, and a smile sprung to his face when he saw six bodies milling around one of the posts. 

Suddenly there was a shout- probably from Donghyuck- and then three bodies were barreling down the sidewalk, the others close on their heels. Jaemin started running too- running as fast as he could until he could make out Donghyuck and Jisung and Chenle’s faces, dropping his duffle bag and slamming into the boys with almost enough force to knock them all down. 

“Fuck- you’re here,” Donghyuck sobbed, burying his face into Jaemin’s neck while Jisung and Chenle hung onto his arms, hugging him tightly. 

“Hey-” 

“Missed you so much, hyung,” Jisung murmured, and Jaemin almost cried, instead making a choking noise that Chenle instantly clowned. Some things never changed. 

“Hey.” There was a tap on his Donghyuck-free shoulder, and Jaemin shuffled around to the best of his ability to see a smiling Renjun, Mark close behind him. “Injun, Mark hyung,” Jaemin grinned, pulling out of the boys’ embrace to hug the older boys. Pulling away he couldn’t help but look around, biting his lip. “Behind you,” Mark whispered, and Jaemin turned, his heart thundering in his chest. 

Jeno. 

Standing on the sidewalk, in the shade of the trees, a shy grin on his face as he held a bouquet of plum blossoms, the full embodiment of everything Jaemin had missed the most. 

And then Jaemin felt the air rush past him as he ran, closing the last few feet between them, throwing himself into the older boy’s arms. The bouquet was knocked to the ground, the scent of _Jeno_ so strong, Jaemin’s hands gripping the older’s soft blue shirt. A muffled cry made it’s way past his lips as Jeno’s arms closed around him, pressing them close- closer, until all Jaemin could feel was Jeno- a hand threaded through the older’s hair as he cried into the crook of Jeno’s neck. Jaemin could feel Jeno shudder, a giveaway that the older was crying too. 

“Y-You-” Jaemin couldn’t care less when his voice broke, not when Jeno pulled back the tiniest bit so that their eyes met- they were red and puffy, as were his own, Jaemin was sure, but Jeno’s eyes sparkled, emotions flickering through them before a smile took over his face, eyes curving up into crescents. 

Jaemin made a strangled noise, hands curling around Jeno’s face to cup his cheeks. No words were exchanged before Jaemin pressed their lips together, pouring all of his loneliness and worry and want into the kiss, Jeno’s hands gripping his waist tightly. 

“I love you-” Jaemin said before he could stop himself, Jeno’s eyes widening a bit before another large smile took over his face and he pressed their foreheads together. 

“I love you too.” 

Jaemin’s cheeks ached from smiling so much- he burst into a fit of giggles before kissing Jeno again, all smiles, throwing his arms around the boy’s neck and rubbing their noses together. All he could feel was Jeno, and he never wanted to let go. 

“Do you think they know that we’re still h-” 

“Shut up,” Renjun hissed, cutting Chenle off. 

Jaemin just giggled, shifting in Jeno’s arms so that he could lean his head against the boy’s shoulder and look at their apparent audience. “Sorry- I wanted to greet you all properly-” 

“But it’s been months since you last locked lips with Jen,” Donghyuck shrugged, face full of mirth. Jeno blushed, nosing at Jaemin’s hair. 

“So, you’re staying for a week, right?” Chenle asked. 

Jaemin nodded. “Yep! I talked to the principal and she said I could stay in the dorms again like last time I came. I assume you’re staying there too, Mark hyung?” 

Mark nodded, slinging an arm around Donghyuck’s waist. “Yeah, Hyuckie helped me unpack last night.” 

“Among other things,” Donghyuck added, giggling when all the boys made disgusted noises. 

Jaemin hummed, looking over all the boys. They looked healthy, he noticed immense changes in Renjun’s complexion, probably due to the fact that he had started sleeping. The boys’ hair colors were all various shades of brown, apart from Chenle and Mark, who both were blonde. But overall, it looked like nothing much had changed. 

“Wanna go inside?” Renjun asked. “It’ll be curfew in a bit. We still have to follow it.” He rolled his eyes. 

They all trailed inside, Donghyuck linking arms with Jaemin as they prattled on about the changes in their lives. Jaemin told them all about starting school again and the new friends he had made; Hyunjin and Seungmin. 

“Are they nice?” Donghyuck asked. 

“Watch out, your jealousy is showing,” Chenle sing-songed, receiving a pillow in the face from the couch they were now squeezed onto. 

Jaemin laughed. “Don’t worry, you guys are still my besties.” 

“We better be,” Donghyuck pouted, and Jaemin smiled. 

“It’s fucking hard,” Mark sighed when they breached the topic of his own schooling. “First of all one of my teachers hates me so I’m practically failing that class because he gives me nothing but bad grades. And then my roommate- Yukhei? Xuxi or Lucas, whatever he’s called, is always doing pull ups off of his bunk and never cleans up after himself.” 

Jeno snorted, hands tightening around Jaemin’s waist and pulling him onto his lap, Jisung rolling his eyes at the move. “What a fuckboy name, Lucas,” Renjun chimed in from where he was alphabetizing their movie collection on the floor. Chenle let out a screech of laughter, clinging onto Donghyuck. 

“Hit him with a fly swatter,” Jisung suggested, “maybe that’ll get him to do what you want. I do it with Chenle when he won’t stop being loud.” 

Mark shook his head, but smiled, watching Chenle crawl over the couch to punch Jisung’s shoulder. 

“I vote we watch something and then go to bed,” Donghyuck yawned, cuddling up to Mark. 

“Maybe if you hadn’t been so wound up about Jaems coming you wouldn’t be so tired,” Mark chided, but pulled the younger closer. 

An hour later found Donghyuck and Chenle passed out, Jisung’s eyes on the verge of closing as _Serendipity_ played on the screen. Chenle shifted in his sleep, knocking a bag of sour gummy worms off his lap, the sugar spilling onto the floor. Renjun winced but turned back to the movie. 

“I’m gonna take him to bed,” Mark murmured, lifting Donghyuck up. “G’night guys. It’s nice to have you back, Jaemin.” Jaemin smiled, trailing after Mark as he carried Donghyuck into their room. 

“Injun, I think we might head off to bed too,” Jaemin whispered. “What should we do about Chenle and Jisungie?” 

“I’ll take care of them, don’t worry,” Renjun replied, lowering the volume on the tv. Jaemin smiled at him and stood up, taking Jeno’s hand and leading him into their bedroom. Jeno wandered into the room, grabbing some clothes out of his dresser and going into the bathroom to change and get ready for bed. 

Jaemin stayed by the open door, watching as Renjun gently maneuvered a pillow under Chenle’s head, then arranging a blanket over his curled up body. He then moved to Jisung, whispering a few words to the half awake boy, rubbing his arm as the youngest laid down, tucking a blanket around him. Renjun moved back to observe his work, the boys curled up on opposite sides of the couch, now sound asleep. 

Jaemin watched as a smile took over Renjun’s face, a single tear rolling over his cheek. 

And then suddenly Jaemin could feel it; the love. It was everywhere, not only romantic but platonic, brotherly. The feeling of security and warmth was so strong Jaemin felt his fingertips tingle, tears creeping to his own eyes. 

“Jaemin?” 

Jaemin turned around, smiling at Jeno with wet eyes. “Do you feel it?” 

“Hm?” Jeno cocked his head in confusion. 

“The love that connects all of us.” 

Jeno nodded, answer short. “Yes. Always have.” 

Jaemin grinned, wrapping his arms around Jeno’s shoulders. “I missed you all.” 

Jeno smiled, resting his forehead against Jaemin’s. “We missed you as well.” 

***

Later that night Jaemin slipped into bed beside Jeno, immediately cuddling up to the boy’s chest, cheek pressed over his heart. Jeno’s hands rested on the small of his back, the warmth seeping through Jaemin’s shirt. 

“Missed this,” Jaemin sighed, running his fingers along Jeno’s upper arm. He felt vibrations as Jeno hummed in agreement. “It’s better than falling asleep together on video chat.” 

Jeno stroked Jaemin’s side, the younger almost purring in contentment. “How do you feel? Being back?” 

“It’s hard I guess, it’s like coming home and knowing I’m gonna be leaving again soon.” 

Jeno nodded. “I understand. It’s not the same, but it kills me knowing you’re gonna leave again. It- it feels like I’ve lost you twice already, when you got discharged and when you left in March.” 

He took a shuddering breath and Jaemin immediately pulled himself up, balancing on one hand so he could lean over Jeno to cup his cheek. “It’s so hard- I feel it too. Like I’m leaving the best thing in m-my life over and over again.” His voice wobbled and Jeno reached up to thread a hand through his hair, thumb running circles into the back of Jaemin’s neck. “I just miss you so much, all the time,” Jaemin felt tears coming on, Jeno’s eyes wet as well. 

“L-Let’s not cry,” Jeno murmured, wiping away Jaemin’s tears with his free hand, “it hurts so much to see you sad.” 

Jaemin let out an airy chuckle, leaning down to carefully kiss the boy. His lips were a little bit chapped, but Jeno’s were soft and warm, and Jaemin kissed him softly and sweetly, trying to forever imprint the feeling into his memory, as if it wasn’t already there to stay. 

“Jaemin-” Jeno whispered, slightly out of breath when they broke apart, “Jaemin, I- I can’t form words when I’m with you I sound like an idiot-” Jaemin giggled, kissing the nervous boy’s forehead. “It’s just, when you told me you loved me everything made sense.” Jeno stared up at Jaemin with glistening eyes, so full of happiness- and devotion? Jaemin sucked in a breath, fingertips fluttering nervously over Jeno’s stomach. “It- I just _love you_ , Jaemin,” Jeno whispered, and Jaemin felt light headed, the older boy never failing to take his breath away. 

“I love you too,” he breathed, “so much, you’ve always been here,” he reached for Jeno’s hand, placing it over his heart. 

Jeno smiled, eyes disappearing into crescents and Jaemin couldn’t help but coo, running a hand through the boy’s dark hair. 

“Y’know, the boys will probably expect us up tomorrow morning, and it’s getting late,” Jaemin pouted at the alarm clock, “we should go to bed.” 

“Bold of you to assume I care about the other boys,” Jeno giggled. 

“I would love to stay here forever with you, but I do want to see them before I have to go back to Seoul. Sorry, love,” Jaemin murmured, brushing Jeno’s bangs out of his eyes. 

“Y-You called me-” Jeno blushed, face turning pink. 

“Oh- do you not like it, it just slipped out- I’m sorry-” 

“I like it,” Jeno whispered, shyly looking up at Jaemin. 

Jaemin grinned, pressing a kiss to his forehead before finally lying back down, this time letting Jeno nuzzle against his clavicle, hands finding their way into the older boy’s hair again. “Okay then, love.” 

He heard Jeno whine, fingers tightening in the fabric of Jaemin’s sleep shirt. “Y-You- just go to bed,” he rushed out, face hidden in embarrassment. 

“You’re so cute,” Jaemin chuckled before reaching over to the table and shutting off the light. “I’m so glad to be back with you. Sleep well, my love.” 

Jeno’s breath audibly hitched before he shifted to bury his face in Jaemin’s neck. The younger boy sighed happily, one hand running up and down Jeno’s back while the other pulled the covers up further around them, cocooning them in a bubble of warmth. 

“Goodnight, Nana,” Jeno whispered before his breaths evened out, sleep overcoming him. 

Jaemin smiled, pulling Jeno closer, and for the first time in months his mind was at ease. It would continue to be hard to live apart from the people he cared most about, but as he held the love of his life in his arms he knew that everything would turn out okay.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed, please leave kudos and comments! Mwha ily all <3


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